  
The Mid-Life Tribulation
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
| The Mid-Life Tribulation
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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The Mid-Life Tribulation is a premium questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Clash of Creeds: Christmas Royale content update. It requires Yahweh to be obtained.
Dialogue
Yahweh unlocked notification
| After unlocking Yahweh
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| Message
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Yahweh has come to Springfield! Complete his sidequest to unlock his never-ending mid-life crisis and earn donuts every time he hits rock bottom!
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Pt. 1
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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So what's he doing now?
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Yahweh, I'm really not comfortable spying on God for you. Can't you just be happy being yourself?
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I am happy. But I want to know what his secret is. Why is he so much more popular than me?
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I wouldn't say he's more popular.
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I have ten million followers and he has over a billion. I'd say that's more popular.
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Well, he appeals to a different demo.
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What do you mean a different demo? Is that some kind of crack?
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You appeal to believers who are more sophisticated, more mature…
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Are you saying I'm old?
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Yes.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Realize He's Old". The job takes place at Jewish Walk of Fame, Temple Beth Springfield, Jewish Heaven, Invisible House, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Worry About Where This is Heading". The job takes place at Jewish Walk of Fame, Temple Beth Springfield, Jewish Heaven, Invisible House, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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It has been a while since I smote an Assyrian horde. And I don't even remember the last time I saw the old Pillar of Salt, if you know what I mean.
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Sadly, I do. What I would give to be 800 again!
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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Pt. 2
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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Ok, maybe I am not quite as young as I once was. But age is just a number, right? 4,000 is the new 2,000. We just need to get back out there.
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Or maybe we should just gracefully accept the inevitable?
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The first step is to get ripped.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Join a Gym". The job takes place at Lugash's Gym, Old Scratch's Gym, All Night Gym, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Reluctantly Get Into Cycling". The job takes place at Lugash's Gym, Old Scratch's Gym, All Night Gym, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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My body fat is five percent and my resting heart rate is 50. I feel like I did on the seventh day!
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Weren't you tired then from creating the universe?
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Nothing that a mimosa over brunch couldn't fix. That's why I created Sundays.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 3
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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Now that we're ripped, our faith will surely start appealing to a younger demographic. Go round up some new followers. Starting with her.
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I think the headphones mean "leave me alone".
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Or, maybe they mean "I like music", you wuss. Come on, show some swagger, Moses.
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If you say so.
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I say so.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Get on Instagram". The job takes place at Jewish Walk of Fame, Temple Beth Springfield, Jewish Heaven, Invisible House, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Approach Gym Patrons". The job takes place at Lugash's Gym, Old Scratch's Gym, All Night Gym, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Cookie Kwan is owned: Task: "Make Cookie Kwan Ignore Moses". The job takes place at Lugash's Gym, Old Scratch's Gym, All Night Gym, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Squeaky Voice Teen is owned: Task: "Make Squeaky Voice Teen Ask Yahweh and Moses to Leave". The job takes place at Lugash's Gym, Old Scratch's Gym, All Night Gym, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Did you get her number?
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How old are you? Even I know nobody asks for a number anymore. I didn't even get eye contact.
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Okay, I'll admit it. You were right. People go to the gym to work out, not to be hit on by Old Testament prophets.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 4
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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Maybe we should focus on recruiting more age-appropriate followers.
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Maybe you should stop being such a Deuteronomy Downer.
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We just need to sweeten the pot by showing that we're not just incredibly ripped — we're fun, exciting, and rich!
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Task: "Make Yahweh Buy a Porsche". The job takes place at Towne Centre at Springfielde Glenne, Springfield Mall, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Check Yahweh's Followers". The job takes place at Towne Centre at Springfielde Glenne, Springfield Mall, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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License and registration.
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I don't have either of those.
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Do you have any photo ID?
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Sorry, not a big fan of graven images.
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How am I supposed to give you a ticket?
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My friend has been going through a hard time lately. His people left him for a younger Supreme Being.
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If you could possibly forgive us this once, there could be some milk and honey in it for you.
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What do I look like — a Graham Cracker?
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Milk and honey and donuts.
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Drive safely!
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 5
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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We'll take the hoodie, for sure. The Skechers, definitely.
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Right on.
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What do you think about board shorts? Can I pull those off?
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For sure.
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What's wrong with the robes? The robes have dignity.
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The robes scream day room in the senior center. We might as well carry a remote and use walkers. We're never going to get cool young followers with the robes.
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The robes are forgiving. The robes cover a lot of middle-age spread.
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You've got a point.
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Do you have camo jackets?
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Right this way.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Post Selfies". The job takes place at Jewish Walk of Fame, Temple Beth Springfield, Jewish Heaven, Invisible House, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Compare Yahweh's Follower Counts to God's". The job takes place at Jewish Walk of Fame, Temple Beth Springfield, Jewish Heaven, Invisible House, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Moses, my man! You look fly!
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I feel stupid.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 6
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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Now that we've got the look, where do we show it off?
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The food court at the mall?
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I don't think that's quite the right place to connect to the new young followers we need.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Go to a Rave". The job takes place at Draggle Rock, Hard Lad Nightclub, One Night Stan's, Businessman's Social Club, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Reluctantly Tag Along". The job takes place at Draggle Rock, Hard Lad Nightclub, One Night Stan's, Businessman's Social Club, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
If God is owned: Task: "Make God Like Yahweh's Rave Selfies". The job takes place at Heaven, Jewish Heaven, Heavenly Swing Set, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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*shouting* This is amazing!
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What?
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This is fantastic!
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What?
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Nevermind.
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What?
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 7
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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This rave is off the hook!
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Can we go now? I'm tired.
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Have one of these energy drinks. That'll pick you up — big time!
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What's in it?
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Who knows!
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Where'd you get it?
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They're going around.
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Do you think that's wise?
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Lighten up, Moses. You've got to get into the vibe if we want to connect to young followers.
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I think I'm going to pass.
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More for me!
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Task: "Make Yahweh Keep the Party Going". The job takes 4 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Quietly Edit Yahweh's Tweets". The job takes place at Draggle Rock, Hard Lad Nightclub, One Night Stan's, Businessman's Social Club, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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I'm thinking of changing my name to Y-Axis.
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Why would you do that?
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Why? Y? I get it. That's hilarious.
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What?
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You should change your name to Mu-ses.
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I'm good with Moses.
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BOR-ING!
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Don't you see it? Mu. It's a Greek letter. It's a variable. It's a Zen koan. It's everything. You're everything.
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I think we should get you home.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 8
| After tapping on Yahweh's exclamation mark
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What happened last night?
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I've got millions of new followers but my head hurts, my feet hurt, and I'm all over TMZ with my face buried in a burrito.
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I told you no good would come of acting like kids.
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You were right. We should stick to our demo.
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Task: "Make Yahweh Hire An Image Consultant". The job takes 24 hours.
If Moses is owned: Task: "Make Moses Put His Feet Up". The job takes place at Heaven, Jewish Heaven, Heavenly Swing Set, or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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Isn't this better? Sunshine, orange juice, and eggs benedict! This is the life for men — or beings — of our stature.
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The crowd here makes me feel old.
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You are old.
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I guess so.
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I think those ladies at the buffet are checking us out.
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Yes, they are definitely checking us out. Go see if you can recruit them.
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Seriously?
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We're old, not dead. I've still got some of the Old Infinite Power.
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Can't you just go talk to them?
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If I could do that, what would I need prophets for?
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Fine. Just let me finish my eggs.
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Take your time. We don't want to seem too eager.
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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