Difference between revisions of "A Family Man"

{{TB|What could you possibly need that much money for? You’re Dad’s not being blackmailed again, is he?}}

{{TB|Not that I know of. I wanna buy a Swiss Army Knife. The Ultra XX Hunter Signature Premium model. It’s not the crappy one that Sprawl-Mart makes.}}

{{TB|You never give me anything I want. You’re giving the Only Child Syndrome a bad name!}}

{{TB|It’s the outfit that Luigi gave me when I got food poisoning at his restaurant!}}

{{TB|Wait a minute… I’ll ask Luigi for a job that pays four hundred and fifty dollars! He’ll say okay. He’s always saying it on his pizza boxes.}}

{{TB|Mom, I’m going out! I’m gonna get a job so I can buy knives!}}

{{TB|{{*}}puts hands up{{*}} I understand. I guess I just don’t have what it takes to make it in the restaurant business.}}

{{TB|Hey, let me-a look at those tiny-a little hands. Magnifico! These would be-a perfect for rolling my gnocchi! You’re hired! Now wash-a you hands and put on dis-a hairnet.}}

{{TB|Here you are, Mr. Fat Tony. Our finest dish just-a for you. It’s on da house.}}

{{TB|Of-a course. Right-a this way. This is Milhouse, he’s-a handling all of da gnocchi.}}

{{TB|I was here to pay my respects, but now that I see who’s been rolling my gnocchi…get him, boys!}}

{{TB|Shut up, kid. The gnocchi was perfect. Plump, tender, melt-in-your-mouth perfect…}}

{{TB|But I’d recognize the nephew of [[Dante Calabresi Jr.]] anywhere. So now, it’s time to make the sign of the cross for a different reason.}}

{{TB|Wait, didn’t Michael poison Dante Jr.?}}

{{TB|Yeah, but he’s talking about his nephew. Besides, I saw him at Tony and Selma’s wedding.}}

{{TB|Guys, is this really the time to discuss show canon? I’m about to settle a blood feud. {{*}}cocks gun{{*}}}}

{{TB|Ah, I just can’t do it. It would be a shame to waste such a magnificent chef. Tell ya what, why don’t you come work for me instead of me killing you.}}

{{TB|Well…if you insist.}}

{{TB|This is my son, Michael. You two will work out of my D’Amico Summer Home for now.}}

{{TB|Pleasure to meet you. My father tells me you’re quite the chef.}}

{{TB|Maybe if you can teach me your secrets, he’ll one day respect me as a man. If not, I can just poison him. You know what I mean?}}

{{TB|You’ve heard of it?}}

{{TB|Ah, yes. We Italians generally avoid the Swiss. All that neutrality makes us crazy…}}

{{TB|That’s a lot of exceptions.}}

{{THT|{{Task/Job|Make Milhouse Talk About Swiss Army Knives While He Works|8 hours|the [[D'Amico Summer Home]] or a [[Brown House]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Michael D’Amico Talk With Milhouse While He Works|8 hours|the [[D'Amico Summer Home]] or a [[Brown House]]|char=[[Michael D'Amico]]}}|colspan=2}}

{{TB|Don’t mention it. If you’re going to be working for me, naturally, I want you to feel protected.}}

{{TB|Usually, yes. They’re very practical. Lots of useful tools in there.}}

{{TB|I’ve got a hundred and seventy-two of them! I can’t pay my rent, but I gotta hand it to those Swiss. What with the cheese and the chocolate and the cuckoo clocks—}}

{{TB|Right…}}