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Co-Dependent's Day/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki



Lisa: Dad, I still have a couple of questions about this. Mom never drives drunk, and the crash was in your car. Also the driver's seat was adjusted for your stomach.
Homer: Lisa, Lisa your suspicions are important to me and will be answered in the order received.

Homer: I'm in no condition to drive. Wait! I shouldn't listen to myself! I'm drunk!

Otto: I didn't know British coal miners had it so bad! There's blood on your hands, Mrs. Thatcher!

Homer: When I feel weak I'll draw strength from the Bible. (opens the bible and starts drinking; his stomach rumbles) Uh-oh, here comes the Gospel according to puke!

Marge: Oh no, I'm gonna be incarcer--(hiccups), incarcer--(hiccups), I'm going to jail.

(While Homer is on the phone with the rehab clinic)
Homer: I can't talk to my wife for 28 days. Sir, she is not an alcoholic. You can't put me on hold, I'll put you on hold. (singing) I am a lineman for the county. (speaking) Your call is important to us. Please continue to hold. (singing) And I drive the main road. (speaking) There are…eight calls ahead of you. (singing) And the Wichita lineman is still on the li-li-li-li-li-li-li-li-li-li-li-li-line.

Homer: (about his book-box Bible that holds liquor) No wonder they call it the Good Book.
Season 15 Quotes
Treehouse of Horror XIV My Mother the Carjacker The President Wore Pearls The Regina Monologues The Fat and the Furriest Today I Am a Clown 'Tis the Fifteenth Season Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens and Gays I, (Annoyed Grunt)-bot Diatribe of a Mad Housewife Margical History Tour Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore Smart and Smarter The Ziff Who Came to Dinner Co-Dependent's Day The Wandering Juvie My Big Fat Geek Wedding Catch 'Em If You Can Simple Simpson The Way We Weren't Bart-Mangled Banner Fraudcast News