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Simpsons Christmas Stories/Quotes

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
< Simpsons Christmas Stories
Revision as of 04:27, November 17, 2019 by 2F13 (talk | contribs) (linking)


Season 17 Episode Quotes
364 "The Italian Bob"
365
"Simpsons Christmas Stories"
"Homer's Paternity Coot" 366


Virgin Mary: Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man.
Saint Joseph: Tell me about it.
Virgin Mary: And yet, I am with child.
Saint Joseph: A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.

Marge: I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
Homer: It's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.

Bart: Grampa?!
Lisa: What are you doing in the chimney?
Grampa: Trying to kill Santa. What's it to ya?!
Bart: What do you have against Santa?
Grampa: He screwed me over back in WWII! I was a navy pilot in the Pacific.
Lisa:Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question?
Bart: It just slipped out!

Grampa: Cyrus, I miss you every day.
Santa Claus: He misses you, too.
Grampa: Wait! He, what, who?!
Santa Claus: Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
Grampa: Will we be back for the tournament of roses parade?
Santa Claus: Probably not.
Grampa: Good, I hate that crap.
Santa Claus: Yeah, me, too.

Marge: Where's Reverend Lovejoy? He's never been late for christmas service.
Homer: Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.
Season 17 Quotes
The Bonfire of the Manatees The Girl Who Slept Too Little Milhouse of Sand and Fog Treehouse of Horror XVI Marge's Son Poisoning See Homer Run The Last of the Red Hat Mamas The Italian Bob Simpsons Christmas Stories Homer's Paternity Coot We're on the Road to D'ohwhere My Fair Laddy The Seemingly Never-Ending Story Bart Has Two Mommies Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife Million-Dollar Abie Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore The Wettest Stories Ever Told Girls Just Want to Have Sums Regarding Margie The Monkey Suit Marge and Homer Turn a Couple Play