Difference between revisions of "The Seemingly Never-Ending Story/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
m (Bot: applying template Qf, rearranging links (code: quotes))
m (→‎top: replaced: Rich Texan → The Rich Texan (11), the The Rich Texan → The Rich Texan (2))
 
(One intermediate revision by one other user not shown)
Line 2: Line 2:
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|My Fair Laddy|Bart Has Two Mommies}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|My Fair Laddy|Bart Has Two Mommies}}
  
−
----
 
 
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Our god made their god.
 
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Our god made their god.
 
----
 
----
Line 8: Line 7:
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Mad beast!
 
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Mad beast!
−
{{qf|Burns}} Liberal midget!
+
{{qf|[[Burns]]}} Liberal midget!
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|[[Rich Texan]]}} ''[after the Rich Texan douses Mr. Burns' head with crude oil]'' Back in Houston, we call that a "Fort Worth Shampoo"!
+
{{qf|[[The Rich Texan]]}} ''[after The Rich Texan douses Mr. Burns' head with crude oil]'' Back in Houston, we call that a "Fort Worth Shampoo"!
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} ''[emerging from the shadows holding a revolver]'' I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} ''[emerging from the shadows holding a revolver]'' I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
−
{{qf|Marge}} How can you take it? We haven't even found it.
+
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} How can you take it? We haven't even found it.
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} It's right behind the rock on the left. No, your left. "Texas" Left, which is your down.  
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} It's right behind the rock on the left. No, your left. "Texas" Left, which is your down.  
−
:''[Marge holds up the bag]''  
+
:''[Marge holds up the bag.]''  
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
 
{{qf|Burns}} ''[emerging from behind a thin stalactite holding a derringer]'' Not so fast, Shady Bird Johnson! I'll take that gold!
 
{{qf|Burns}} ''[emerging from behind a thin stalactite holding a derringer]'' Not so fast, Shady Bird Johnson! I'll take that gold!
 
{{qf|[[Moe]]}} ''[emerging from the shadows holding a baseball bat]'' Yeah, y'all take the gold and then you'll give it to me if ya know what's good for ya.
 
{{qf|[[Moe]]}} ''[emerging from the shadows holding a baseball bat]'' Yeah, y'all take the gold and then you'll give it to me if ya know what's good for ya.
−
:''[Burns and the Rich Texan aim their guns at Moe]''
+
:''[Burns and The Rich Texan aim their guns at Moe.]''
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[nervous]'' You guys got guns? ''[retreats to the shadows]'' Uh, yeah, me too. ''[makes the sound of cocking a shotgun]'' Huh? Huh?
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[nervous]'' You guys got guns? ''[retreats to the shadows]'' Uh, yeah, me too. ''[makes the sound of cocking a shotgun]'' Huh? Huh?
 
{{qf|[[Snake]]}} Coolest entrance gets the gold! ''[goes down a rope like James Bond]'' I hope it's okay that I brought my son. Today's my day with him. ''[points to Bart]'' Look, Jeremy. There's a boy you can play with.
 
{{qf|[[Snake]]}} Coolest entrance gets the gold! ''[goes down a rope like James Bond]'' I hope it's okay that I brought my son. Today's my day with him. ''[points to Bart]'' Look, Jeremy. There's a boy you can play with.
−
{{qf|Jeremy}} ''[to Bart]'' You like Xbox?
+
{{qf|[[Jeremy Jailbird|Jeremy]]}} ''[to Bart]'' You like Xbox?
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Burns}} I had to start up from the bottom to get my fortune back. And to get to the bottom, I had to work my way up from Moe's.
 
{{qf|Burns}} I had to start up from the bottom to get my fortune back. And to get to the bottom, I had to work my way up from Moe's.
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} YEE-HAW! I'm gonna win me a nuclear plant!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} YEE-HAW! I'm gonna win me a nuclear plant!
 
{{qf|Mr. Burns}} Dream on, bitch.
 
{{qf|Mr. Burns}} Dream on, bitch.
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|[[Carl]]}} ''[to Burns]'' Hey barboy, write a play where I meet Henry Ford and Captain Kirk!
 
{{qf|[[Carl]]}} ''[to Burns]'' Hey barboy, write a play where I meet Henry Ford and Captain Kirk!
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} YEE-HAW! Moe can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} YEE-HAW! Moe can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break!
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} Howdy! What's your business, boy?!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} Howdy! What's your business, boy?!
 
{{qf|Burns}} Nuclear power. I make money using my brain, not sticking a pole in the ground and praying for goo.
 
{{qf|Burns}} Nuclear power. I make money using my brain, not sticking a pole in the ground and praying for goo.
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} ''[after Burns gives him the gold]'' Okay. I'll give you back all your worldly possessions, exceptin' this here nu-clear plant, until you give me a picture of yourself with a smilin' child!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} ''[after Burns gives him the gold]'' Okay. I'll give you back all your worldly possessions, exceptin' this here nu-clear plant, until you give me a picture of yourself with a smilin' child!
 
{{qf|Burns}} What the hell could that possibly mean to you?
 
{{qf|Burns}} What the hell could that possibly mean to you?
−
{{qf|Rich Texan}} I'm obsessive compulsive! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]''Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! :''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4!
+
{{qf|The Rich Texan}} I'm obsessive compulsive! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]''Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! ''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4! ''[firing his pistols]'' Ye-haw! :''[tapping his foot]'' 1-2-3-4!
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[retelling the story of his tragic romance with Edna]'' I was the happiest guy in the world, but fate likes to play a little game called 'Up Yours, Moe.'
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[retelling the story of his tragic romance with Edna]'' I was the happiest guy in the world, but fate likes to play a little game called 'Up Yours, Moe.'
Line 45: Line 44:
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[telling his story]'' I knew that in order to keep Edna, I'd have to get rid of the human garbage otherwise known as "my friends".
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[telling his story]'' I knew that in order to keep Edna, I'd have to get rid of the human garbage otherwise known as "my friends".
−
:''[throws out [[Barney]], then [[Lenny]] and Carl, then Barney again, then Homer, then gets ready to throw out Barney again]''
+
:''[Throws out Barney, then [[Lenny]] and Carl, then Barney again, then Homer, then gets ready to throw out Barney again.]''
 
{{qf|Moe}} Barney, how do you keep getting back in here?
 
{{qf|Moe}} Barney, how do you keep getting back in here?
−
{{qf|Barney}} I'm a drunk. I don't know nothin' 'bout how I do anything.
+
{{qf|[[Barney]]}} I'm a drunk. I don't know nothin' 'bout how I do anything.
 
:''[Moe throws Barney out again and then Barney is back in the bar, behind Moe.]''
 
:''[Moe throws Barney out again and then Barney is back in the bar, behind Moe.]''
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[to Homer, Barney, Lenny and Carl]'' Listen Boozebags! I got a good thing going here. If you mess it up I will out the one of you who is gay!  
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[to Homer, Barney, Lenny and Carl]'' Listen Boozebags! I got a good thing going here. If you mess it up I will out the one of you who is gay!  
−
:''[the drunks then run off in a flamboyant fashion]''  
+
:''[The drunks then run off in a flamboyant fashion.]''  
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[to Edna]'' Now, where were we? ''[they resume kissing]''
 
{{qf|Moe}} ''[to Edna]'' Now, where were we? ''[they resume kissing]''
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Snake}} I've been robbed! I'll take my revenge on society...by which I mean convenience stores! And who would suspect me, Professor Jailbird!
+
{{qf|Snake}} I've been robbed! I'll take my revenge on society... by which I mean convenience stores! And who would suspect me, Professor Jailbird!
 
----
 
----
 
{{qf|Moe}} I didn't want the gold, so I just kept playing our song on the jukebox one...
 
{{qf|Moe}} I didn't want the gold, so I just kept playing our song on the jukebox one...
Line 83: Line 82:
 
{{qf|Homer}} Wait a minute. You're telling Moe's story in Burns' story in your story?
 
{{qf|Homer}} Wait a minute. You're telling Moe's story in Burns' story in your story?
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Yes, dad. It's like a play inside of a play, like Hamlet.  
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Yes, dad. It's like a play inside of a play, like Hamlet.  
−
:''[Homer looks at her puzzled]''
+
:''[Homer looks at her puzzled.]''
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Fine, it's like you watching a home movie of you watching TV.
 
{{qf|Lisa}} Fine, it's like you watching a home movie of you watching TV.
 
{{qf|Homer}} ''[understanding]'' Oh yeah.
 
{{qf|Homer}} ''[understanding]'' Oh yeah.
 
----
 
----
−
{{qf|Homer}} ''[after falling down the hole in the cave]'' I'm stuck, and I have to pee! ''[A few seconds later]'' Now I'm just stuck.
+
{{qf|Homer}} ''[after falling down the hole in the cave]'' I'm stuck, and I have to pee! ''[a few seconds later]'' Now I'm just stuck.
−
----
 
  
 
{{Season 17|Q}}
 
{{Season 17|Q}}
 
{{DEFAULTSORT:Seemingly Never-Ending Story/Quotes, The}}
 
{{DEFAULTSORT:Seemingly Never-Ending Story/Quotes, The}}

Latest revision as of 10:06, August 25, 2022


Season 17 Episode Quotes
← 368 "My Fair Laddy"
369
"The Seemingly Never-Ending Story"
"Bart Has Two Mommies" 370 →


Homer: Our god made their god.

Homer: Save me, Tsisnajini!

Lisa: Mad beast!
Burns: Liberal midget!

The Rich Texan: [after The Rich Texan douses Mr. Burns' head with crude oil] Back in Houston, we call that a "Fort Worth Shampoo"!

The Rich Texan: [emerging from the shadows holding a revolver] I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
Marge: How can you take it? We haven't even found it.
The Rich Texan: It's right behind the rock on the left. No, your left. "Texas" Left, which is your down.
[Marge holds up the bag.]
The Rich Texan: I'll take the gold iffin' ya please!
Burns: [emerging from behind a thin stalactite holding a derringer] Not so fast, Shady Bird Johnson! I'll take that gold!
Moe: [emerging from the shadows holding a baseball bat] Yeah, y'all take the gold and then you'll give it to me if ya know what's good for ya.
[Burns and The Rich Texan aim their guns at Moe.]
Moe: [nervous] You guys got guns? [retreats to the shadows] Uh, yeah, me too. [makes the sound of cocking a shotgun] Huh? Huh?
Snake: Coolest entrance gets the gold! [goes down a rope like James Bond] I hope it's okay that I brought my son. Today's my day with him. [points to Bart] Look, Jeremy. There's a boy you can play with.
Jeremy: [to Bart] You like Xbox?

Burns: I had to start up from the bottom to get my fortune back. And to get to the bottom, I had to work my way up from Moe's.

The Rich Texan: YEE-HAW! I'm gonna win me a nuclear plant!
Mr. Burns: Dream on, bitch.

Carl: [to Burns] Hey barboy, write a play where I meet Henry Ford and Captain Kirk!

The Rich Texan: YEE-HAW! Moe can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break! 1-2-3-4! Can't catch a break!

The Rich Texan: Howdy! What's your business, boy?!
Burns: Nuclear power. I make money using my brain, not sticking a pole in the ground and praying for goo.

The Rich Texan: [after Burns gives him the gold] Okay. I'll give you back all your worldly possessions, exceptin' this here nu-clear plant, until you give me a picture of yourself with a smilin' child!
Burns: What the hell could that possibly mean to you?
The Rich Texan: I'm obsessive compulsive! [firing his pistols] Ye-haw! [tapping his foot] 1-2-3-4! [firing his pistols]Ye-haw! [tapping his foot] 1-2-3-4! [firing his pistols] Ye-haw! [tapping his foot] 1-2-3-4! [firing his pistols] Ye-haw! :[tapping his foot] 1-2-3-4!

Moe: [retelling the story of his tragic romance with Edna] I was the happiest guy in the world, but fate likes to play a little game called 'Up Yours, Moe.'

Moe: Fate gave me an awful dilemma — should I rob the guy or rob him and kill him?

Moe: [telling his story] I knew that in order to keep Edna, I'd have to get rid of the human garbage otherwise known as "my friends".
[Throws out Barney, then Lenny and Carl, then Barney again, then Homer, then gets ready to throw out Barney again.]
Moe: Barney, how do you keep getting back in here?
Barney: I'm a drunk. I don't know nothin' 'bout how I do anything.
[Moe throws Barney out again and then Barney is back in the bar, behind Moe.]

Moe: [to Homer, Barney, Lenny and Carl] Listen Boozebags! I got a good thing going here. If you mess it up I will out the one of you who is gay!
[The drunks then run off in a flamboyant fashion.]
Moe: [to Edna] Now, where were we? [they resume kissing]

Snake: I've been robbed! I'll take my revenge on society... by which I mean convenience stores! And who would suspect me, Professor Jailbird!

Moe: I didn't want the gold, so I just kept playing our song on the jukebox one...
Burns: [reading letter] ...one gold coin at a time. [looks at jukebox] Oh, you poor man. You're about to get poorer.

Burns: [voice over] I steamed open the letter using Moe's cappuccino machine.
Moe: [in letter] If you are reading this, I am dead and I shall tell you the story about my treasure.
Burns: [reading letter] Treasure?!
Lisa: [in flashback] Treasure?!
Homer: Moe has a cappuccino machine?!

Professor Snake Jailbird: So, I'm excavating this Mayan pyramid and I came across these coins and I was all like "Could you be any more pre-Columbian?"

Burns: [voiceover] At 5.15 an hour, I knew it would take an eternity to get my fortune back. And Fica wasn't helping! But for once, things went my way!

Skinner: [after hearing Bart's story/excuse] Bart, that story is the biggest load of cra...bappel?!? Making out with Moe?!? [he sees Moe and Edna making out outside his office window]

Keypad to Safe Room: Enter password.
Burns: Dammit I forget.
Keypad: Forgot password? Enter place of birth.
Burns: Pangaea.
Keypad: Correct. Your password has been emailed to you.
Burns: D'oh.

Martin: [attached to a kite being flown by Nelson] Lab partners don't treat lab partners like this!
Nelson: Shut up and attract lightning!

Homer: Wait a minute. You're telling Moe's story in Burns' story in your story?
Lisa: Yes, dad. It's like a play inside of a play, like Hamlet.
[Homer looks at her puzzled.]
Lisa: Fine, it's like you watching a home movie of you watching TV.
Homer: [understanding] Oh yeah.

Homer: [after falling down the hole in the cave] I'm stuck, and I have to pee! [a few seconds later] Now I'm just stuck.
Season 17 Quotes
The Bonfire of the Manatees • The Girl Who Slept Too Little • Milhouse of Sand and Fog • Treehouse of Horror XVI • Marge's Son Poisoning • See Homer Run • The Last of the Red Hat Mamas • The Italian Bob • Simpsons Christmas Stories • Homer's Paternity Coot • We're on the Road to D'ohwhere • My Fair Laddy • The Seemingly Never-Ending Story • Bart Has Two Mommies • Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife • Million-Dollar Abie • Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore • The Wettest Stories Ever Told • Girls Just Want to Have Sums • Regarding Margie • The Monkey Suit • Marge and Homer Turn a Couple Play