The Crepes of Wrath/Quotes
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- [Principal Skinner and Homer discuss a way to punish Bart for his string of disrespectful behavior]
- Principal Skinner: I recommend we enroll Bart in a foreign exchange program where he will spend one semester in France. Normally this program is only for students of exceptional merit, but in Bart's case...I am willing to make an exception.
- Homer: WOO HOO!
- Principal Skinner: The fact Bart does not know French will not be an issue. Normally after exposure to native speakers 24 hours a day the average man can become very skilled in a language, but in Bart's case...I am sure he will enough French to get by.
- Homer: All right! Hey...wait! All right, Skinner, how do we know some headmaster in France is not trying the same scam we are and trying to get rid of one of his troublemakers on us?
- Principal Skinner: Well for one, you would not be getting a French boy. You will be getting an Albanian.
- Homer: You mean all white with pink eyes?
- [Bart eats one grape when he is deep in the vineyard. Ugolin appears out of nowhere]
- Ugolin: Ungrateful swine!
- Adil: How can you support a nation where 5% of the population controls 95% of the wealth?
- Lisa: I support America because people are free to speak their minds without adverse consequences and are free to go to any place of worship they desire.
- Adil: Can not!
- Lisa: Can too!
- Homer: OK! OK! Cut it out, both of you! Maybe Lisa has a point about the importance of freedom of speech and free exercise of religion and Adil has a point about the machinery of capitalism being oiled with the blood of the workers.
- Ugolin: Le vin est encore trop non distillées et prendre un certain temps pour qu'il soit suffisamment mûr pour être vendus.
- Cesar: Chaque fois que je rencontre ce problème, je me rappelle le miracle de l'antigel.
- [Cesar adulterates the wine by adding antifreeze to it.]
- Ugolin: Si nous n'avons pas le tester en premier?
- Cesar: Pas de problème, j'ai fait l'objet parfait.
- Cesar: Oh Bart, would you like some of this?
- Bart: I do not think I should.
- Cesar: Do not worry, this is France. It is customary for our children to take a little wine every now and again.
- Bart: Yes, but that has antifreeze in it.
- Cesar: DRINK IT!
- [Homer sees Bart's stuff on the floor and picks a Krusty doll.]
- Homer: Geez look at this mess. I told that boy to pick up his jun--
- [Homer fells downstairs crying out and lands on the floor with a thud and the Krusty doll lands behind him and plays "I like yo play with you." Homer tries to stand up.]
- Homer: My back. [to Santa's Little Helper] Go get help boy. [licks him and fells asleep as the Krusty doll's voice slowly fades and Maggie crawls to Homer] Oh Maggie. My poor back. [put her pacifier on his mouth and fells asleep]
- [Marge and Lisa arrive and see Homer laying on the floor with Maggie, Snowball II and Santa's Little Helper.]
- Lisa: Dad!
- Marge: Homer what happened?
- Homer: [groans] The boy. Bring me the boy.
- [Marge rushes upstairs to Bart's room.]
- Marge: Bart, If you clean up your room when i asked you to, your father's trick back still be aligned. So you'll pick up this mess right now.