Noodleball
Noodleball
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Sport Information
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Noodleball is a sport created by Homer and Grampa.
History[edit]
In an attempt to make a swimming pool in the backyard, Homer rented heavy machinery to dig it out. However, he damaged power cables under the yard, which caused rolling blackouts across Springfield. After a court case, where Homer was suing Builder's Barn for letting him rent the machinery despite being an idiot, Homer was awarded $95 and was forbidden from renting heavy machinery anymore. As a result of this, the swimming pool went unfinished. Despite this, Homer used the money he won to buy pool noodles and balls. When Marge asked Homer if he wanted his legacy to be the person that the court called a buffoon, Homer realized that he wouldn't leave a legacy. He then sat in the unfinished pool with the noodles and balls and started batting a ball around the hole with a pool noodle.
When Grampa went to speak to Homer to figure out what was wrong with him, Homer was hitting a ball around the hole still. Grampa grabbed another pool noodle and hit the ball back at Homer, causing Homer to be annoyed that he interrupted his "roundsie," which was what he called it when the ball went all around the pool and back to him. Grampa then decided he wanted to try it, and he and Homer had a fun time batting the ball back and forth, trying to score roundsies. When Ned heard the commotion, he went to see what they were doing, and Homer revealed that they were playing Noodleball.
Homer and Grampa then took pool noodles and balls to the Springfield Retirement Castle to let the other seniors try the game in the empty pool. As the seniors enjoyed playing the sport, Homer realized that this could be his and Grampa's legacy. The sport became widely played, picking up media attention from Channel 6's Kwirky Korners with Kent Brockman. However, when summer started to come around, people wanted to swim in the pools once more, leading to them getting filled and the sport coming to a halt.
While moping about the end of their sport, Homer and Grampa were approached by Gabriel Razelton, who was a representative for the Organic Pit-based Enjoyment Council. Razelton told them that he wanted avocados to sponsor Noodleball and revealed a model of the Avo-1 Noodleplex, a stadium where Noodleball could be played. He also revealed that a statue of Homer and Grampa would be out the front of the stadium. However, when Grampa left the room, Razelton revealed that he wanted to cut Grampa and seniors out of the sport completely and have it aimed at 40 to 60 year olds, the last generation that could afford houses. Homer was against it at first but quickly changed his mind.
On the opening day of the stadium, a celebrity Noodleball tournament was held. Razelton showed the Simpsons around and introduced Homer to some of the sports stars who were there. However, Homer started to feel guilty about cutting Grampa out of the sport he helped create. Lisa convinced Homer to turn his back on OPEC, and Homer went to confront Razelton again. He demanded to play in the tournament with Grampa, instead of Andrew Luck who he was supposed to be partnered with. Razelton accepted this and had Homer and Grampa play against the sport's best players, Blake Griffin and Megan Rapinoe. However, at the start of the game, Homer injured his hip and Grampa had a heart attack. The creators of the sport injuring themselves that badly in a game resulted in the popularity of Noodleball, and stocks in Avocado, plummeting.
Rules[edit]
The rules, as stated by Homer and Grampa, are: "If you hit the ball past your opponents and it bounces back to you, that's a roundsie: one point. Your opponents are trying to block the roundsie and hit it back to score their own point. [Homer] Play until three balls get knocked out of the pool, and then everyone can check their phone for ten minutes."
Section 29 of the official rules stated:
- If a dog steals your pool ball, you're allowed to steal its ball.
- All players must count up their meds, and the one with the most pills serves first.
- The pool noodle may be blown through, but not yelled through.
- In between points, a maximum of three pictures of grandkids may be shown, four if the kids are costumed or in a school play.
- If a player's pool noodle comes untied, that player must call "Flopper," and the play is suspended until the laughter subsides.
- If the pool being played in has a separate hot tub, nice.
