| Mr. McGrew's Excellent Adventure
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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Mr. McGrew's Excellent Adventure is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the A Christmas Peril content update. It requires Mr. McGrew to be obtained.
Dialogue[edit]
| After tapping on Mr. McGrew's exclamation mark
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Greetings and salutations, my good sir!
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Hey Lou, what's with the old guy talking to the yield sign?
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Well, we are only a few blocks from the Retirement Castle. And it's a stop sign.
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Everybody else stops. The chief of police yields.
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My my, you've lost weight. Rail thin, I'd say. Now, now, no need to go red-faced with embarrassment.
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Is he breaking any laws?
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Don't think so, Chief.
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Well, maybe there should be a law against confusing a police chief.
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That'd lock up a lot of people.
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What'd you say, Lou?
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Nothin', Chief.
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Task: "Make Mr. McGrew Have a Polite Conversation With a Stop Sign". The job takes place at a Stop Sign, Retirement Castle, Golden Exits Retirement Farm, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Wiggum is owned: Task: "Make Wiggum Dream About Imprisoning Confusing People". The job takes place at the Retirement Castle, Golden Exits Retirement Farm, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Lou is owned: Task: "Make Lou Wonder why He's Paid so Little". The job takes place at the Retirement Castle, Golden Exits Retirement Farm, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
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You take care of yourself! See you!
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Oh boy.
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You okay there, chief?
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I was thinking about imprisoning everyone who confused me. And then how much paperwork I'd have to fill out. Really took it out of me.
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I can imagine.
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Taxi! Taxi! *climbs into a potted plant* Sir, your back seat is quite filthy and full of roots.
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Come on, Lou. Let's get out of here before someone expects us to do something about it.
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Right behind you, Chief.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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| After tapping on Mr. McGrew's exclamation mark
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Excuse me, sir. Kindly refrain from touching anything in the store until after you have purchased it. And kindly refrain from touching it then, too.
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*talks to a Radioactive Man cardboard standup* Where were you when that swimming pool stepped in front of me?
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Oh. You're that rich and senile old man that everyone is talking about. Kindly refrain from talking to expensive memorabilia during any of your delusions.
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Ah! My adoring fans have arrived!
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Task: "Make Mr. McGrew Greet the People". The job takes 4 hours.
If Comic Book Guy is owned: Task: "Make Comic Book Guy Lock the Door to the Store". The job takes place at the Android's Dungeon and takes 4 hours.
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*runs into the front door of the store* So, it's fisticuffs you want? Then it's fisticuffs you shall have!
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Excuse me! Kindly refrain from smudging the front door of my establishment. Stan Lee breathed on it once.
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You haven't seen the last of Ebenezer McGrew! *walks into the door again*
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Mr. McGrew's exclamation mark
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Time for a visit to the old watering hole.
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Welcome to Moe's. What can I get you?
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Not now, Harlot. I wish to speak to the barkeep.
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Harlot? I've heard a lot of insults thrown my way, but that's a new one.
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*speaking to the pool table* A pint of your finest ale!
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Comin' right up.
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You're going to serve him, even though he's already talking to the pool table?
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Hey, bud. If I stopped serving people who couldn't pick me out from the pool cues, I'd lose half my customer base.
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I'm really a dangerous enabler.
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If Moe is owned: Task: "Make Moe Get Mr. McGrew a Beer". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Mr. McGrew Attempt to Converse With Billiard Balls". The job takes place at Moe's Tavern or a Brown House and takes 4 hours.
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All right, one pint of our finest ale.
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Thank you, but my answer is still no. You are beautiful, my lady, but my heart belongs to another.
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Okay, if you're calling me beautiful, I gotta cut you off. One more case of alcohol poisoning and they'll pull my license.
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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If Mr. McGrew's Stovepipe Oven is owned
After tapping on Mr. McGrew's exclamation mark
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Home at last. Time to see if any visitors have come calling.
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Marie! I haven't seen you in some time! *talks to a stovepipe oven* And do my eyes deceive me? Are you with child?
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| Task: "Make Mr. McGrew Bump Into an Old Friend". The job takes place at Mr. McGrew's Stovepipe Oven and takes 4 hours.
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*looks around to see if anyone is nearby*
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Confused two policemen, an obsessive-compulsive shop clerk, and a self-loathing bartender, not to mention Sky Finger. All in all...a successful afternoon's outing.
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*winks* McGrew, you've undone it again!
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to the film Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure.
