Bartman - Part Two: Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves/Quotes

Quotes

Luann Van Houten: This can't be happening! What kind of evil monster would play such a horrible trick?!

Kirk Van Houten: This wild-goose chase is a disaster, Wiggum! Don't you have anything to say?!

Chief Wiggum: It's a tragedy! A perfectly good cruller gone to waste!

Eddie: I think he's talking about the boy, sir.

Chief Wiggum: Oh yeah. Him too.

Kent Brockman: Interviewing the Van Houtens now would be in bad taste. Therefore, I'm waiting until sweeps week when I can really cash in on the advertising buck. Until then, the purple clad criminal should look into the eyes of these parents and think about what he's done. Bartman, this time you've gone too far!

Marge: Would anyone like another sweet and sour tuna croquette?

Grampa: Not until I buy more life insurance!

Homer: Boy, stop playing with your food!

Bart: Who's playing, man? Mine's still moving.

Marge: It's called sashimi.

Grampa: Dern foreign cars!

Bart: No matter how hard I try to get out, this madman keeps pulling me back in! I have no choice but to don the purple mantle one last time. I'll do it for Houseboy. For my trusted sidekick... Bartman will return!!

Lisa: Could it be true? Could I have stumbled upon the most sought-after criminal in Springfield history?

Bartman: Auntie Em, is that you?

Lisa: He looks so different, so stupid in person. No one has ever unmasked the mysterious vigilante. Think of the publicity I'd get. The talkshow appearances, romantically-linked tabloid articles, and million-dollar book deals. Regardless, I refuse to behave selfishly. I owe it to Springfield to uncover this criminal's true identity! [GASP] Bart?!

Bart: Waitress, I'd like a gooey-cheeseburger with fries and --

Lisa: What's in it for moi, dear brother?

Bart: Do it for justice!

Lisa: I'd rather do it for six months of your allowance.

Bart: Deal.

Marge: I didn't know doctors still made house calls.

Dr. Hibbert: We don't. You just paid for my vacation to the Bahamas!

Homer: D'oh!!

Lisa the Conjuror: Have no fear, Bart. It's time for the supergirls of Springfield to take over!

Bart: You're going to save the world with Homer's underwear on your head?!

Lisa the Conjuror: Short of a bedsheet, it's the only thing I could find with enough material. Beware, evildoers! Lisa the Conjuror and the Great Maggeena are here!!

Bart: [thinking] It's getting late. Where are they?! My senses tell me something's wrong. Unfortunately, I'm powerless to do anything! But if my sisters are in danger, then it's up to me to save them! I won't let the slimeball responsible for this escape!

Bartman: You've picked on the wrong family, pal! Prepare to meet thy doom!