Difference between revisions of "The Telltale Head/Quotes"

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{{TabQ|gags=yes
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{{TabQ}}
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|episode = The Telltale Head
 
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Call of the Simpsons|Life on the Fast Lane}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Call of the Simpsons|Life on the Fast Lane}}
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:'''[[Jimbo Jones|Jimbo]]''': Naw, that was cloud talk. Throwing stones is one thing but I would never cut off the head of a guy who killed a bear with his own hands. What's in the bag, Bart?
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:'''[[Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': Uhhhh.
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{{qf|[[Jimbo]]}} Naw, that was cloud talk. Throwing stones is one thing but I would never cut off the head of a guy who killed a bear with his own hands. What's in the bag, Bart?
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:'''Jimbo''': I said, what's in the bag, Bart?!
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Uhhhh.
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{{qf|Jimbo}} I said, what's in the bag, Bart?!
 
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:'''[[Janey Powell|Janey]]''': Will my dog [[Pepper]] be there?
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{{qf|[[Janey]]}} Will my dog [[Pepper]] be there?
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{{qf|[[Ms. Albright]]}} I'm sorry but the answer is no.
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:'''[[Ms. Albright]]''': I'm sorry but the answer is no.
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{{qf|Janey}} Why not?
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} Because Heaven is for people.
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:'''Janey''': Why not?
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} What about my cat [[Snowball]]?
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} I'm sorry, but the answer is no!
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:'''Ms. Albright''': Because Heaven is for people.
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{{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} Will there be cavemen in heaven?
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} Certainly not.
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:'''[[Lisa]]''': What about my cat [[Snowball]]?
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{{qf|Bart}} Uh, ma'am. What if you're a really really good person, but you're in a really, really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and it has to be amputated, will it be waiting for you in Heaven?
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} For the last time Bart, yes!
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:'''Ms. Albright''': I'm sorry, but the answer is no!
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} ''[continuing the conversation from earlier]'' The ventriloquist goes to heaven, but the dummy doesn't.
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:'''Bart''': Uh, maam. What if you're a really really good person and you've been in a really really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and it has to be amputated, Will it be waiting for you in Heaven?
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{{qf|Bart}} Oh, oh, oh! Me!
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} Bart?
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:'''Ms. Albright''': For the last time Bart, Yes!!!
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{{qf|Bart}} What about a robot with a human brain?
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{{qf|Ms. Albright}} I don't know! All these questions... is a little blind faith too much to ask?!
 
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:'''[[Krusty the Clown|Krusty]]''': [grimly] There's someone out there in [[Krustyland]] who has committed an atrocity! If you know who cut off [[Statue of Jebediah Springfield|Jebediah]]'s head...I don't care it's your brother, your sister, your daddy or your mommy...''(cheerfully)'' Turn 'em in and Krusty will send you a free slide-whistle just like [[Sideshow Bob]]!!
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{{qf|[[Krusty]]}} ''[grimly]'' There's someone out there in [[Krustyland]] who has committed an atrocity! If you know who cut off [[Statue of Jebediah Springfield|Jebediah]]'s head...I don't care it's your brother, your sister, your daddy or your mommy...''[cheerfully]'' Turn 'em in and Krusty will send you a free slide-whistle just like [[Sideshow Bob]]!!
 
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:'''Bart''': Dad, can I borrow five bucks?
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{{qf|Bart}} Dad, can I borrow five bucks?
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{{qf|[[Homer]]}} I hope you're not planning on seeing a certain movie starring certain {{ap|Space Mutants|films}} that a certain mother didn't want you to see. ''[laughs]''
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:'''[[Homer]]''': I hope you're not planning on seeing a certain movie starring certain [[Space Mutants (films)|Space Mutants]] that a certain mother didn't want you to see. ''(laughs)''
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{{qf|Bart}} ''[laughs]'' Perish the thought!
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[handing Bart five dollars]'' Here you go son. 'Share the wealth', that's what I always say!
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:'''Bart''': ''(laughs)'' Perish the thought!
 
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:'''Homer''': ''(handing Bart five dollars)'' Here you go son. 'Share the wealth', that's what I always say!
 
  
 
{{Season 1|Q}}
 
{{Season 1|Q}}
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{{DEFAULTSORT:Telltale Head/Quotes}}
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{{DEFAULTSORT:Telltale Head/Quotes, The}}

Latest revision as of 20:51, July 28, 2024


Season 1 Episode Quotes
← 007 "The Call of the Simpsons"
008
"The Telltale Head"
"Life on the Fast Lane" 009 →


Jimbo: Naw, that was cloud talk. Throwing stones is one thing but I would never cut off the head of a guy who killed a bear with his own hands. What's in the bag, Bart?
Bart: Uhhhh.
Jimbo: I said, what's in the bag, Bart?!

Janey: Will my dog Pepper be there?
Ms. Albright: I'm sorry but the answer is no.
Janey: Why not?
Ms. Albright: Because Heaven is for people.
Lisa: What about my cat Snowball?
Ms. Albright: I'm sorry, but the answer is no!
Milhouse: Will there be cavemen in heaven?
Ms. Albright: Certainly not.
Bart: Uh, ma'am. What if you're a really really good person, but you're in a really, really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and it has to be amputated, will it be waiting for you in Heaven?
Ms. Albright: For the last time Bart, yes!

Ms. Albright: [continuing the conversation from earlier] The ventriloquist goes to heaven, but the dummy doesn't.
Bart: Oh, oh, oh! Me!
Ms. Albright: Bart?
Bart: What about a robot with a human brain?
Ms. Albright: I don't know! All these questions... is a little blind faith too much to ask?!

Krusty: [grimly] There's someone out there in Krustyland who has committed an atrocity! If you know who cut off Jebediah's head...I don't care it's your brother, your sister, your daddy or your mommy...[cheerfully] Turn 'em in and Krusty will send you a free slide-whistle just like Sideshow Bob!!

Bart: Dad, can I borrow five bucks?
Homer: I hope you're not planning on seeing a certain movie starring certain Space Mutants that a certain mother didn't want you to see. [laughs]
Bart: [laughs] Perish the thought!
Homer: [handing Bart five dollars] Here you go son. 'Share the wealth', that's what I always say!
Season 1 Quotes
Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire • Bart the Genius • Homer's Odyssey • There's No Disgrace Like Home • Bart the General • Moaning Lisa • The Call of the Simpsons • The Telltale Head • Life on the Fast Lane • Homer's Night Out • The Crepes of Wrath • Krusty Gets Busted • Some Enchanted Evening