Difference between revisions of "Steal This Episode/Quotes"
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| − | {{TabQ}} | + | {{TabQ|nogags}} |
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|White Christmas Blues|Married to the Blob}} | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|White Christmas Blues|Married to the Blob}} | ||
| − | + | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Ooh, date night! I'll go change my bra. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} If I wanted to pay for commercials I can't skip, I'd sign up for Hulu Plus! | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Homer}} Bless you, boy. That was the greatest thing I've seen on a computer that I can talk about with you in the room. How did you know how to do that? | |
| − | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} I'm under 30. | |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|[[Carl Carlson]]}} Homer, go to the theater and see the movie. | |
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Theaters? All I need to see this movie is a laptop and a Web site based in a country that's really just an offshore oil platform. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | + | {{qf|Carl}} All we want is brand-new, big budget entertainment in our homes for nothin'. | |
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[to Homer]'' This is fun! And it was so nice of the movie company to let you show their film. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Marge}} When I watched that pirated movie, I was stealing with my eyes. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|FBI Soldier}} I wanted to catch serial killers. | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Deputy Director Gratman]]}} ''[mocking his soldier in whiny voice]'' I wanted to catch serial killers. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} I'm not wearing an undershirt and my badge is poking into my skin. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Deputy Director Gratman}} We got our man, thanks to a tip from a heroic American snitch. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} ''[Angry at Superintendent Chalmers]'' Superintendent Chalmers, you never forgave me for that time we wore the same Hawaiian shirt to that luau! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Deputy Director Gratman}} From now on, the only place you'll be watching movies without having to buy a ticket is jail. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} ''[about Santa's Little Helper eating Homer's dinner]'' It's almost like having Dad here. Only with less growling when I go near his food. | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} I just want to know who dropped the dime on Dad. Lousy rat. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Marge}} ''[asking Swedish ambassador]'' Your country doesn't think illegally downloading movies is wrong? | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} The people of Sweden believe all movies should be shared freely. | ||
| + | {{qf|Marge}} How is that not stealing? | ||
| + | {{qf|[[Gottfrid]]}} Bah, your Hollywood studios are the real thieves, claiming all their hit movies have lost money. I spit on their bookkeeping. | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Yeah, and why don't they make a sequel to ''Taken'' where ''The Hangover'' guys get taken and the only ones that could rescue them is ''Fast and Furious.'' | ||
| + | {{qf|Bart}} Aw, man, I would love to pirate that. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Deputy Director Gratman}} There's only one surefire way to get fugitives out of a foreign building—blasting death metal. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Gottfrid}} Swedes love death metal. It's remind us of death. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Deputy Director Gratman}} Damn those Peace Prize-giving fish-smoker. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|{{Ch|Judd Apatow}}}} Homer Simpson is an enemy of art. Art created by writers, directors, and the guy who uses a computer to erase or enhance nipples. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Bart}} So what do you think, Lise? Who are the good guys here? The media companies or the Internet freedom guys? | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Well, both groups claim their intentions are noble, but at the end of the day, they're both trying to steal as much money as they can. | ||
| + | {{qf|Bart}} So everyone's a pirate? | ||
| + | {{qf|Lisa}} Yes, and the worst one of all is...(Cut off with footage of the 2011 NASCAR race) | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} What are you guys in for? | ||
| + | {{qf|Dan}} Bank robbery. | ||
| + | {{qf|Kevin}} Drug trafficking. What about you? | ||
| + | {{qf|Homer}} Movie piracy. | ||
| + | :''[everyone else gasps]'' | ||
| + | {{qf|Dan}} People in show business work hard to make those movies. | ||
| + | {{qf|Kevin}} My media stocks underperformed because of people like YOU! | ||
| + | {{qf|Hank}} My brother lost his job as a grip-holder. He had to sell his jet ski. A grip without a jet ski ain't no GRIP AT ALL! | ||
| + | :''[breaks himself and his colleagues free while Dan strangles Homer with a chain]'' | ||
| + | {{qf|Kevin}} Oh, you're about to find out what we do to copyright infringers! | ||
| + | |||
{{Season 25|Q}} | {{Season 25|Q}} | ||
Latest revision as of 08:05, May 20, 2021
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- Marge: Ooh, date night! I'll go change my bra.
- Homer: If I wanted to pay for commercials I can't skip, I'd sign up for Hulu Plus!
- Homer: Bless you, boy. That was the greatest thing I've seen on a computer that I can talk about with you in the room. How did you know how to do that?
- Bart: I'm under 30.
- Carl Carlson: Homer, go to the theater and see the movie.
- Homer: Theaters? All I need to see this movie is a laptop and a Web site based in a country that's really just an offshore oil platform.
- Carl: All we want is brand-new, big budget entertainment in our homes for nothin'.
- Marge: [to Homer] This is fun! And it was so nice of the movie company to let you show their film.
- Marge: When I watched that pirated movie, I was stealing with my eyes.
- FBI Soldier: I wanted to catch serial killers.
- Deputy Director Gratman: [mocking his soldier in whiny voice] I wanted to catch serial killers.
- Chief Wiggum: I'm not wearing an undershirt and my badge is poking into my skin.
- Deputy Director Gratman: We got our man, thanks to a tip from a heroic American snitch.
- Homer: [Angry at Superintendent Chalmers] Superintendent Chalmers, you never forgave me for that time we wore the same Hawaiian shirt to that luau!
- Deputy Director Gratman: From now on, the only place you'll be watching movies without having to buy a ticket is jail.
- Lisa: [about Santa's Little Helper eating Homer's dinner] It's almost like having Dad here. Only with less growling when I go near his food.
- Bart: I just want to know who dropped the dime on Dad. Lousy rat.
- Marge: [asking Swedish ambassador] Your country doesn't think illegally downloading movies is wrong?
- Lisa: The people of Sweden believe all movies should be shared freely.
- Marge: How is that not stealing?
- Gottfrid: Bah, your Hollywood studios are the real thieves, claiming all their hit movies have lost money. I spit on their bookkeeping.
- Homer: Yeah, and why don't they make a sequel to Taken where The Hangover guys get taken and the only ones that could rescue them is Fast and Furious.
- Bart: Aw, man, I would love to pirate that.
- Deputy Director Gratman: There's only one surefire way to get fugitives out of a foreign building—blasting death metal.
- Gottfrid: Swedes love death metal. It's remind us of death.
- Deputy Director Gratman: Damn those Peace Prize-giving fish-smoker.
- Judd Apatow: Homer Simpson is an enemy of art. Art created by writers, directors, and the guy who uses a computer to erase or enhance nipples.
- Bart: So what do you think, Lise? Who are the good guys here? The media companies or the Internet freedom guys?
- Lisa: Well, both groups claim their intentions are noble, but at the end of the day, they're both trying to steal as much money as they can.
- Bart: So everyone's a pirate?
- Lisa: Yes, and the worst one of all is...(Cut off with footage of the 2011 NASCAR race)
- Homer: What are you guys in for?
- Dan: Bank robbery.
- Kevin: Drug trafficking. What about you?
- Homer: Movie piracy.
- [everyone else gasps]
- Dan: People in show business work hard to make those movies.
- Kevin: My media stocks underperformed because of people like YOU!
- Hank: My brother lost his job as a grip-holder. He had to sell his jet ski. A grip without a jet ski ain't no GRIP AT ALL!
- [breaks himself and his colleagues free while Dan strangles Homer with a chain]
- Kevin: Oh, you're about to find out what we do to copyright infringers!
