Treehouse of Horror XXV/Quotes
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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556
"Treehouse of Horror XXV"
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- Principal Skinner: This has been a bad week, even for you, Simpson. Concrete in the sandbox...
- Ralph Wiggum: I don't get lost anymore!
- Principal Skinner: ...spreading the rumor that today's lunch would be served by a naked lady...
- Nelson Muntz: I wanna see boobs in the soup.
- Principal Skinner: There is no naked lunch lady! Bart made it up!
- Superintendent Chalmers: Yes, yes, I-I knew that.
- Principal Skinner: There's no hope for you, Simpson. You'll be locked in detention until you graduate to the penal system.
- Bart: Penal. [chuckles]
- Principal Skinner: Stop laughing! I said "penal" not "penile".
- Bart: [bigger chuckles] Penile.
- Principal Skinner: It's not like you made me say "penis"!
- Bart: [bigger laugh]
- Hellroads student: Red dress, how original.
- Lisafer: Making fun of someone's clothes. How original.
- Hellroads student: [impressed noise] You wanna walk with us?
- Lisafer: It's true! It would be a cold day in Hell when I was popular.
- Beelzebart Simpson: Ow! This has never happened before! I have a crush on my teacher!
- Hellroads teacher: [flirty] Down here we can make that happen.
- Beelzebart: Every time the sinner screams in pain, the scream blows this windmill, which pumps even more piranhas into his aquarium underwear... causing more screaming.
- Hellroads teacher: Wow. Wow. Oh, that is so evil -- and I know evil! I'm head of the teachers' union.
- Marge: I couldn't help noticing this school is located in... I'm not one to judge, but... um...
- Homer: I'll say it, Marge, it's in Hell! The Inferno! Perdition! Arizona without the golf!
- Hellroads Principal Skinner: We do have golf, but all the greens are tricky.
- Beelzebart: Mom, please tell me I can go to Hell.
- Moog: [narrating] That was me, when I was a young hoodlink, with me three bestest Glugs, Leonard, Carlton and Dum. We was narsty tastards we were, even though we dressed like Carol Channing's backup dancers.
- Moog: [narrating] Everything was all fish and chippy... until Dum collected himself a twiggy-wick.
- Dum: Oy! I'm getting hitched to this bluebird and she wants me to give up the glug life.
- Moog: Welly, welly, well, well, well. What sorry future would you have without your truest lunos by your side?
- Dum's girlfriend: [proudly] Dum got a job at the Tower of London... as a beefeater!
- Dum: I hope it's what I think it is.
- Moog: These eye clamps are the only way I can tolerate today's TV.
- Announcer: Tonight, on Fox...
- Moog: [agonized moan] Turn it off! I'll be good! I'll be good! [sobs]
- Moog: Those punks got no respect for them what come before. They didn't even wear no codpieces!
- Dum: How do they expect to draw the eye to their chunky-wunks?
- Moog: Come on, Glugs! Let's show these nectarinos we're still the best at what we do -- beating up old people and bare-naked ladies!
- Marge: Homie... I think we're not alone.
- Grampa: I was sleeping in your dryer and got caught in your sheets.
- Marge: I'll go make up the couch for you.
- Homer: The bed is lifting me! The elevator at work can't even do that! I demand you put me down right after the sex!
- Homer: Hey... if you're Homer Simpson, show me your driver's license.
- Original Homer: Well, I traded it to a kid for a bite of his sandwich.
- Homer: [gasps] He is me!
- Original Bart: [loud belch]
- Lisa: That was unmotivated.
- Original Bart: Don't have a cow, man.
- Lisa: Shut up!
- Original Bart: Ay carumba! [belches again]
- Original Homer: What kind of afterlife is this? Can't even strangle my dead kid.
- Homer: [to Original Marge] So... yeah. Things aren't perfect with the missus and me. And by the way, nice melons.
- Marge: Those are in the kitchen!
- Homer: D'oh! I can't believe you wasted our money on fruit.
- Marge: So. He likes ghosts better, eh? Fine. [head in oven] Huh. Might as well clean this while I'm killing myself.
- Homer: [shrieks] A ghost!
- Marge: I feel like a ghost the way you haven't been paying attention to me. Plus, I'm dead.
- Homer: Don't yell at me! I'm a double widower! But I can handle all the ghosts you can float at me!
- Marvin Monroe: Simpsons, please! This fighting solves nothing.
- Marge: Doctor Marvin Monroe?! Are you alive or dead?
- Marvin Monroe: I'm in some horrible limbo. I can walk halfway through walls, then I get stuck.
