The Wisdom of Ralph

The Wisdom of Ralph is a list of wisdom words by Ralph from The Ralph Wiggum Book.

The Wisdom of Ralph

• If rice is wriggling, it's not rice.
• A puppy can grow up to be president of America, but a kitten cannot.
• If you put something far enoguh back in your nose, it will come out your mouth.
• When I'm sick, my tummy makes floor soup.
• I eat corn.
• Hamburgers come from little hambs.
• Satan told me to tell you "Hello!"
• I'm undescribable.
• Bitey things are niceless.
• I saw Honolulu out the window.
• My other mommy went to the squirrel farm.
• Pop music is hard work.
• Sleep is where I'm a Viking and that's how the bed gets wet.
• Food is our friend.
• When I hear a bad word, I unlisten.
• Socks are not as funny as they smell.
• The scissors say they won't hurt you, but they're lying.
• If your nose starts to bleed, it means you're picking it too much, or not enough.
• Maacaroni and cheese without cheese is spaghetti.
• Lee Harvey Oswald killed Kennedy.
• Happiness is a dry night.
• The leprechuan tells me to start fires.
• I made a puddle!
• My mommy swallowed a watermelon seed, and a watermelon growed in her stomach, and I was inside it.