| Taxes Hold'em
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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Taxes Hold'em is a questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the IRS and Job Manager content update. It unlocks the IRS.
Dialogue[edit]
| After reaching Level 35
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The best part of rebuilding Springfield is that it makes me proud of my accomplishments.
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On second thought, the best part of rebuilding Springfield is all the money I'm collecting.
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| Message
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Complete this quest chain to unlock the IRS. Use the IRS building to collect income easier!
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| Task: "Make Homer Collect Income by Hardly Working". The job takes 45 seconds.
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Quest reward:  100 and  10
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| After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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Earning money is a lot harder now that Springfield is so big, and everything is so expensive!
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It's called inflation. The more money you create out of thin air, the more expensive things will get.
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I don't really have THAT much money though, see...
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| Task: "Make Homer Count His Money". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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Okay, okay. Maybe I have SOME money. Is that such a crime?
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Actually, Mr. Simpson. Not paying taxes on your income is a very serious crime.
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I'm Agent Johnson of the IRS, and you're going to tell me who else in town has been evading their taxes.
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Look, I get it. You're playing good cop, bad cop. I'd like to speak to the good cop, please.
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That's cute. I am the good cop.
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*whimper*
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| Task: "Make Homer Snitch on Tax Evaders". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 60 minutes.
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So what you're saying is that everyone in Springfield hasn't paid any taxes since the town was destroyed?!
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Even for a member of the IRS that's too much paperwork.
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I suppose since nobody can even tell me what state we're in I have no choice but to let it slide.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark
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So, Agent Johnson. What are you going to do now that the IRS is letting everyone in town evade their taxes?
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Our branch has to do something, and collecting money is all we know. Isn't there any use for that in this town?
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Actually...
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| Message
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Collect your income faster with the IRS - available in the store now!
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| Task: "Build the IRS". It takes 6 seconds.
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After building IRS Building:
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Okay, we've set up our new PERSONAL tax collection service.
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We've started with the base service, which is free of charge.
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Yeah, free, right. I know how things work in this game.
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Come on, it's free! Give it a try. It will allow you to collect your income in a more efficient, a.k.a. lazier way.
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| Message
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Tap on buildings and characters to collect in a radius around them. Upgrade the IRS to increase the area!
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| Task: "Collect Income Using the IRS" (x3).
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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| After completing Pt. 5
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You really did make it easier. Now I can collect taxes while sitting on my couch with a beer in one hand, a sandwich in the other, another beer balanced on my belly, and in this cup holder... a second sandwich.
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I'm afraid to ask what you used to collect taxes with.
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Years of working at the power plant has left me with a pretty useful vestigial tail.
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And a pretty useless case of irreversible radiation poisoning.
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So... can you make that circle thing even bigger so I can collect more money, in less time?
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Of course! You just need to upgrade to our Deluxe or Mega-Lazy service.
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Every time you do we'll make it even easier for you to collect your income.
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So to do less work collecting money, I need to earn a bunch of money first by working?
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Exactly. Let me give you a little lesson in economics.
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Ugh, nevermind. I'll pay for the program as long as I don't have to learn anything.
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| Message
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Upgrade the IRS to increase the Tax Collection Radius and save yourself more tapping!
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| Task: "Upgrade the IRS to Level 2".
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| Quest reward: 2,500 and 250
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| After upgrading the IRS to Level 9
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This is where all my taxes go? To build the IRS a nicer building?!
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I wanted it to go to increased military spending!
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Behind the Laughter[edit]
The quest name is a reference to the poker variation Texas hold 'em.
