Fly Away Homer/Quotes
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- Marge: ...The best family vacation ever! A quick flight to Florida and then we board a luxury liner bound for the Caribbean!
- Lisa: Not just any luxury liner! It's the Itchy & Scratchy Cruise!
- Homer: This brochure says the buffet is open twenty-four hours! Yummm!
- Captain: Sir! i must ask you to disembark this aircraft! You're too fat to fly!
- Homer: Whaaat?! But I--
- Bart and Lisa: Mom! The boat is leaving! Mom! The boat is leaving! Mom! The boat is leaving!
- Marge: Oh dear! Still no sign of your father! We can't go without him!
- Bart: For the love of Krusty! Are we gonna get gypped out of our Itchy & Scratchy Cruise just because Homer is a big tub of goo?!
- Homer: [Munch] I beseech the oppressively overweight to unite! [Chomp] Fight discrimination against our kind! Join the cause! "Flying Freedom For Large And Bulky Souls"!
- Barney Gumble: Homer's right! I can't remember the last time I was allowed on a plane! [Brrrap!] Then again, I can't remember much of anything!
- Chief Wiggum: I always wondered about that "Mile High Club"! Maybe they give cops a discount!
- Homer: What are you doing here, Lenny? You're not fat.
- Lenny Leonard: I'm a habitual joiner!
- Mr. Burns: What am I looking at?
- Waylon Smithers: The numbers, sir! 23% of all Americans are considered obese and they make up seven and a half million of the 100 million people who fly every year.
- Mr. Burns: Oh my. Yes. Exxxcellent! We've got ourselves a deal, gentlemen!
- Bart: Look! Those actors in Itchy & Scratchy suits are passing out lollipops and chocolate bars! Keep 'em coming, stooge!
- Lisa: You must have the best job in the world, mister!
- Squeaky-voiced teen: [taking off mascot head] Wearing this outfit in hundred-degree weather for six dollars an hour? Oh yeah. It's a dream.
- Marge: [Sigh] Without Homer, this so-called family vacation is just boring! There's nothing for me to do... Except partake from the sumptuous twenty-four hour buffet!
- Homer: Marge! Kids! You're...you're a bunch of blimps! What happened?!
- Marge: Without you here, the only thing to do was eat! Are you disappointed in us?
- Homer: heck no! It just means there's more of you to love! Let's have the best family vacation ever!