New article from the Springfield Shopper: Season 36 News: The order and air date for “Stew Lies” and “Full Heart, Empty Pool” have been released!
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...If Homer Simpson Invented Golf!/Quotes

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Text box: Regular holes would be replaced by donut holes.
Homer: Mmmmm... Par 4.

Text box: Boring golf carts would be replaced by the Batmobile, General Lee and KITT from 'Knight Rider'!

Text box: Water traps would be replaced with beer traps!
Principal Skinner: My ball went in. I guess that's a stroke...
Barney Gumble: I'll get it!

Text box: All math would be gone!
Principal Skinner: I shot a 5 on that hole, and you shot a 12.
Homer: So we're tied.
Principal Skinner: But I... Well, there's another school subject that has no use in the real world.

Homer: I think I bent my shaft again.
Ned Flanders: You need to change your grip and quit whacking so hard.
Homer: At least I got a bogey, and everyone saw it. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna use the ball washer.