Difference between revisions of "Treehouse of Horror XIII/Quotes"

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(There is more dialogue in the ending)
 
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__NOTOC__
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge|How I Spent My Strummer Vacation|Treehouse of Horror XIII}}
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{{TabQ|nogags}}
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{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge|How I Spent My Strummer Vacation}}
  
 
== Opening Sequence ==
 
== Opening Sequence ==
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:'''Maude's Ghost''': Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?!
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{{qf|[[Maude Flanders|Maude's Ghost]]}} Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?!
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:'''Lisa''': Well, duh.
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Well, duh.
  
 
== Send in the Clones ==
 
== Send in the Clones ==
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:'''Ned''': ''[Looking through kitchen window]'' Hey, Homer, I was wondering if I could borrow that chainsaw you, ahh ... stole from me?
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{{qf|[[Ned]]}} ''[looking through kitchen window]'' Hey, Homer, I was wondering if I could borrow that chainsaw you, ahh... stole from me?
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:'''Homer''': Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card.
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{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card.
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:'''Ned''': No problem.''[takes out card]'' Discover okay?
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{{qf|Ned}} No problem.''[takes out card]'' Discover okay?
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:'''Homer''': ''[reproachfully]'' Ned.
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[reproachfully]'' Ned.
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:'''Ned''': Okay, here's my Amex.
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{{qf|Ned}} Okay, here's my Amex.
 
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:'''Moe''': All right, who's paying the tab?
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{{qf|[[Moe]]}} All right, who's paying the tab?
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:'''Homer Clones''': LENNY!
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{{qf|[[Homer's clones]]}} LENNY!
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:'''Lenny''': Anything for Homers.
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{{qf|[[Lenny]]}} Anything for Homers.
 
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:'''Marge''': No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer--
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{{qf|[[Marge]]}} No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer--
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:'''Homer Clone''': First over cliff.
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{{qf|Homer clone}} First over cliff.
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{{qf|Marge}} <gasp> My homie's dead?! How will I go on?
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{{qf|Homer clone}} You like backrub?
 
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:'''Homer''': ''[Just created two clones of himself]'' Now there's four of me. I think this might be a magic hammock.
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{{qf|Homer}} ''[just created two clones of himself]'' Now there's four of me. I think this might be a magic hammock.
  
 
== The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms ==
 
== The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms ==
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:'''Lisa''': I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William?
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{{qf|Lisa}} I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William?
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:'''Bart''': Lisa has a dead boyfriend!
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Lisa has a dead boyfriend!
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:'''Lisa''': He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend.
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{{qf|Lisa}} He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend.
 
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:'''Lou''': ''[handing in his gun]'' This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals.
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{{qf|[[Lou]]}} ''[handing in his gun]'' This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals.
 
----
 
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:'''William "Billy the Kid" Bonney''': ''[introducing his gang]'' The Sundance Kid!
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{{qf|William "[[Billy the Kid]]" Bonney}} ''[introducing his gang]'' The Sundance Kid!
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:'''Comic Book Guy''': What happened to Butch Cassidy?
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{{qf|[[Comic Book Guy]]}} What happened to Butch Cassidy?
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:'''Sundance Kid''': "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know!
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{{qf|Sundance Kid}} "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know!
 
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:'''Sideshow Mel''': Another tragedy prevented by gun violence!
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{{qf|[[Sideshow Mel]]}} Another tragedy prevented by gun violence!
  
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== The Island of Dr. Hibbert ==
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== The Island of [[Dr. Hibbert]] ==
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:'''Marge''': The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. ''[laughs]'' Why am I always funny when no one's around?
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{{qf|Marge}} The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. ''[laughs]'' Why am I always funny when no one's around?
 
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:'''Homer''': Oh my God! She's become a monster! Which I have to admit, I sorta suspected during the sex.
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{{qf|Homer}} Oh my God! She's become a monster! Which I have to admit, I sorta suspected during the sex.
 
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:'''Comic Book Guy (Half-goat)''': Hear me, accursed brethren! I understand some of you are still wearing tattered pants. Please throw them on the bonfire, and embrace your animal essence.
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{{qf|Comic Book Guy (Half-goat)}} Hear me, accursed brethren! I understand some of you are still wearing tattered pants. Please throw them on the bonfire, and embrace your animal essence.
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:'''Chief Wiggum (Half-pig)''': Okay, but I'm keeping my tattered vest. I still have my dignity. Hey, slops! ''[eats slops]'' Ooohh, a toenail! Heh, Heh! ''[eats the toenail]''
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{{qf|Chief Wiggum (Half-pig)}} Okay, but I'm keeping my tattered vest. I still have my dignity. Hey, slops! ''[eats slops]'' Ooohh, a toenail! Heh, Heh! ''[eats the toenail]''
 
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:'''Homer''': You guys are nuts! All you can do is eat and sleep and mate and roll around in your own filth and mate and eat -- ''[abruptly breaks off]'' Where do I sign up?
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{{qf|Homer}} You guys are nuts! All you can do is eat and sleep and mate and roll around in your own filth and mate and eat -- ''[abruptly breaks off]'' Where do I sign up?
 
----
 
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:'''Lisa''': How do you like being a walrus, Dad?
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{{qf|Lisa}} How do you like being a walrus, Dad?
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:'''Homer''': It's great! I haven't been this skinny since high school!
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{{qf|Homer}} It's great! I haven't been this skinny since high school!
  
 
{{Season 14|Q}}
 
{{Season 14|Q}}

Latest revision as of 13:09, December 29, 2020


Season 14 Episode Quotes
← 291 "Poppa's Got a Brand New Badge"
292
"Treehouse of Horror XIII"
"How I Spent My Strummer Vacation" 293 →


Opening Sequence[edit]

Maude's Ghost: Are you ready for tales that will shatter your spine and boil your blood?!
Lisa: Well, duh.

Send in the Clones[edit]

Ned: [looking through kitchen window] Hey, Homer, I was wondering if I could borrow that chainsaw you, ahh... stole from me?
Homer: Yeah, but you'll have to leave a credit card.
Ned: No problem.[takes out card] Discover okay?
Homer: [reproachfully] Ned.
Ned: Okay, here's my Amex.

Moe: All right, who's paying the tab?
Homer's clones: LENNY!
Lenny: Anything for Homers.

Marge: No belly button? You're a clone! Then the real Homer--
Homer clone: First over cliff.
Marge: <gasp> My homie's dead?! How will I go on?
Homer clone: You like backrub?

Homer: [just created two clones of himself] Now there's four of me. I think this might be a magic hammock.

The Fright to Creep and Scare Harms[edit]

Lisa: I dream of a world without guns. Don't we all, William?
Bart: Lisa has a dead boyfriend!
Lisa: He's not my dead boyfriend! He's a dead boy that happens to be my friend.

Lou: [handing in his gun] This always made me feel like a man, you know? Now all I got is my enormous genitals.

William "Billy the Kid" Bonney: [introducing his gang] The Sundance Kid!
Comic Book Guy: What happened to Butch Cassidy?
Sundance Kid: "What happened to Butch Cassidy?" We're not joined at the hip, ya know!

Sideshow Mel: Another tragedy prevented by gun violence!

The Island of Dr. Hibbert[edit]

Marge: The House of Pain? I guess this is where you pay the bill. [laughs] Why am I always funny when no one's around?

Homer: Oh my God! She's become a monster! Which I have to admit, I sorta suspected during the sex.

Comic Book Guy (Half-goat): Hear me, accursed brethren! I understand some of you are still wearing tattered pants. Please throw them on the bonfire, and embrace your animal essence.
Chief Wiggum (Half-pig): Okay, but I'm keeping my tattered vest. I still have my dignity. Hey, slops! [eats slops] Ooohh, a toenail! Heh, Heh! [eats the toenail]

Homer: You guys are nuts! All you can do is eat and sleep and mate and roll around in your own filth and mate and eat -- [abruptly breaks off] Where do I sign up?

Lisa: How do you like being a walrus, Dad?
Homer: It's great! I haven't been this skinny since high school!
Season 14 Quotes
Treehouse of Horror XIII • How I Spent My Strummer Vacation • Bart vs. Lisa vs. the Third Grade • Large Marge • Helter Shelter • The Great Louse Detective • Special Edna • The Dad Who Knew Too Little • The Strong Arms of the Ma • Pray Anything • Barting Over • I'm Spelling as Fast as I Can • A Star Is Born Again • Mr. Spritz Goes to Washington • C.E. D'oh • 'Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky • Three Gays of the Condo • Dude, Where's My Ranch? • Old Yeller-Belly • Brake My Wife, Please • The Bart of War • Moe Baby Blues