Difference between revisions of "Lost Verizon/Quotes"

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{{TabQ
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{{TabQ}}
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|episode=Lost Verizon
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{{EpisodePrevNext|Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes|Double, Double, Boy in Trouble}}
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}}
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(Bart prank calls Hawaii.)
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:''[Bart prank calls Hawaii]''
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:'''Hawaiian Bartender''': Aloha.
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{{qf|[[Hawaiian bartender]]}} Aloha.
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:'''Bart''': Aloha to you. I'm looking for Maya. Last name Normousbutt.
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{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Aloha to you. I'm looking for Maya. Last name Normousbutt.
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:'''Hawaiian Bartender''': Hang on. I'll check. Uh, has anyone seen Maya Normousbutt?
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{{qf|Hawaiian bartender}} Hang on. I'll check. Uh, has anyone seen Maya Normousbutt?
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(Bar patrons laugh.)
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:''[Bar patrons laugh]''
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----
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:''[Bart's found cell phone rings]''
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{{qf|Bart}} Hello? Bart Simpson.
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{{qf|{{Ch|Denis Leary}}}} This is Denis Leary, you little puke! When I find you, I'm gonna tear your heart out with two fingers! I know how to do it, too. I learned it for my show.
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{{qf|Bart}} Which one? The one that got canceled, or the one that's gonna get canceled?
 
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(Bart's found cell phone rings)
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{{qf|Bart}} I'm never gonna have a cell phone.
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:'''Bart''': Hello? Bart Simpson.
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} And I'm never gonna go to [[Machu Picchu]]. In this family, you get used to disappointment.
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:'''Denis Leary''': This is Denis Leary, you little puke! When I find you, I'm gonna tear your heart out with two fingers! I know how to do it, too. I learned it for my show.
 
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:'''Bart''': Which one? The one that got canceled, or the one that's gonna get canceled?
 
 
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:'''Bart''': I'm never gonna have a cell phone.
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{{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} I can't believe I'm out of gas. I put in one dollar of gas and I've only driven ninety cents.
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:'''Lisa''': And I'm never gonna go to Machu Pichu. In this family, you get used to disappointment.
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{{qf|[[Agnes Skinner]]}} You had to drive with the windows open, didn't you, Rockefeller?
 
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:'''Principal Skinner''': I can't believe I'm out of gas. I put in one dollar of gas and I've only driven ninety cents.
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{{qf|Bart}} Mom, even Milhouse has a cell phone. Your son is lamer than Milhouse! What does that say about you?
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:'''Agnes Skinner''': You had to drive with the windows open, didn't you, Rockefeller?
 
 
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:'''Bart''': Mom, even Milhouse has a cell phone. Your son is lamer than Milhouse! What does that say about you?
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:''[Bart is at Lisa's tea party]''
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{{qf|Bart}} I don't know why I agreed to this.
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{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Because you like the taste of my imaginary tea.
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{{qf|Bart}} Oh, you're right.
 
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(Bart is at Lisa's tea party)
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{{qf|Lisa}} ''[seeing what her parents are up to]'' Tracking software? ''[gasps]'' You're spying on Bart!
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:'''Bart''': I don't know why I agreed to this.
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{{qf|[[Marge]]}} Honey, keeping track of someone because you love them is not wrong. It shows you care.
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:'''Lisa''': Because you like the taste of my imaginary tea.
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{{qf|[[Moe Szyslak]]}} ''[Listening to Marge via his own bugging device in the basement]'' That's right my beautiful, beautiful Midge. ''[laughs]'' Soon, you'll be mine.
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:'''Bart''': Oh, you're right.
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{{qf|FBI Agent #1}} ''[observing Moe via spy camera]'' Keep talking, creepo.
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{{qf|FBI Agent #2}} Every word buys you another year in the slammer.
 
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:'''Lisa''': (seeing what her parents are up to) Tracking software? (gasps) You're spying on Bart!
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:''[Dr. Hibbert gives Bart money after retrieving his golf ball]''
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:'''Marge''': Honey, keeping track of someone because you love them is not wrong. It shows you care.
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{{qf|Bart}} A dollar? What for?
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:'''Moe''': (Listening to Marge via his own bugging device in the basement) That's right my beautiful, beautiful Midge. (Laughs) Soon, you'll be mine.
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{{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} It's the least I could do. These balls cost five dollars new.
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:'''FBI Agent #1''': (observing Moe via spy camera) Keep talking, creepo.
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{{qf|Bart}} So I can get a dollar for every ball I find? Then if a cell phone costs $100, how many balls do I need?
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:'''FBI Agent #2''': Every word buys you a year in the slammer.
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{{qf|Dr. Hibbert}} ''[speaking aside to Dr. Riviera, his caddy]'' This is why my kids go to private school. ''[Laughs]''
 
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(Dr. Hibbert gives Bart money after retrieving his golf ball.)
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{{qf|Marge}} Bart, how did you get a cell phone?
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:'''Bart''': A dollar? What for?
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{{qf|Bart}} The same way you got me. By accident, on a golf course.
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:'''Dr. Hibbert''': It's the least I could do. These balls cost five dollars new.
 
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:'''Bart''': So I can get a dollar for every ball I find? Then if a cell phone costs $100, how many balls do I need?
 
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:'''Dr. Hibbert''': (speaking aside to Dr. Riviera, his caddy) This is why my kids go to private school. (Laughs)
 
 
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:'''Marge''': Bart, how did you get a cell phone?
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{{qf|Marge}} Son, we can't afford to get you a cell phone. As it is, I'm buying frozen peas in installments.
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:'''Bart''': The same way you got me. By accident, on a golf course.
 
 
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:'''Marge''': Son, we can't afford to get you a cell phone. As it is, I'm buying frozen peas in installments.
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:''[Bart driving a forklift and Milhouse standing on the lifts]''
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{{qf|[[Milhouse Van Houten]]}} ''[laughing]'' Are you sure this is safe?
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{{qf|Bart}} ''[holding the seat belt]'' Sure I got my seat belt on.
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:''[Marge shows up]''
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{{qf|Marge}} Bartholomew Jay Simpson! ''[Bart brakes the forklift, sending Milhouse flies into a wall, knocking him out]'' What are you doing at this construction site?
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{{qf|Bart}} Uh trying to do something constructive. ''[Marge murmurs disapprovingly]'' I'll just take Milhouse home. ''[picks Milhouse up with the forklift and leaves]''
  
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{{Season 20 Q}}
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{{Season 20|Q}}

Latest revision as of 19:24, July 30, 2021


Season Episode
← 421 "Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes"

"Lost Verizon/Quotes"
"Double, Double, Boy in Trouble" 423 →
[Bart prank calls Hawaii]
Hawaiian bartender: Aloha.
Bart: Aloha to you. I'm looking for Maya. Last name Normousbutt.
Hawaiian bartender: Hang on. I'll check. Uh, has anyone seen Maya Normousbutt?
[Bar patrons laugh]

[Bart's found cell phone rings]
Bart: Hello? Bart Simpson.
Denis Leary: This is Denis Leary, you little puke! When I find you, I'm gonna tear your heart out with two fingers! I know how to do it, too. I learned it for my show.
Bart: Which one? The one that got canceled, or the one that's gonna get canceled?

Bart: I'm never gonna have a cell phone.
Lisa: And I'm never gonna go to Machu Picchu. In this family, you get used to disappointment.

Principal Skinner: I can't believe I'm out of gas. I put in one dollar of gas and I've only driven ninety cents.
Agnes Skinner: You had to drive with the windows open, didn't you, Rockefeller?

Bart: Mom, even Milhouse has a cell phone. Your son is lamer than Milhouse! What does that say about you?

[Bart is at Lisa's tea party]
Bart: I don't know why I agreed to this.
Lisa: Because you like the taste of my imaginary tea.
Bart: Oh, you're right.

Lisa: [seeing what her parents are up to] Tracking software? [gasps] You're spying on Bart!
Marge: Honey, keeping track of someone because you love them is not wrong. It shows you care.
Moe Szyslak: [Listening to Marge via his own bugging device in the basement] That's right my beautiful, beautiful Midge. [laughs] Soon, you'll be mine.
FBI Agent #1: [observing Moe via spy camera] Keep talking, creepo.
FBI Agent #2: Every word buys you another year in the slammer.

[Dr. Hibbert gives Bart money after retrieving his golf ball]
Bart: A dollar? What for?
Dr. Hibbert: It's the least I could do. These balls cost five dollars new.
Bart: So I can get a dollar for every ball I find? Then if a cell phone costs $100, how many balls do I need?
Dr. Hibbert: [speaking aside to Dr. Riviera, his caddy] This is why my kids go to private school. [Laughs]

Marge: Bart, how did you get a cell phone?
Bart: The same way you got me. By accident, on a golf course.

Marge: Son, we can't afford to get you a cell phone. As it is, I'm buying frozen peas in installments.

[Bart driving a forklift and Milhouse standing on the lifts]
Milhouse Van Houten: [laughing] Are you sure this is safe?
Bart: [holding the seat belt] Sure I got my seat belt on.
[Marge shows up]
Marge: Bartholomew Jay Simpson! [Bart brakes the forklift, sending Milhouse flies into a wall, knocking him out] What are you doing at this construction site?
Bart: Uh trying to do something constructive. [Marge murmurs disapprovingly] I'll just take Milhouse home. [picks Milhouse up with the forklift and leaves]
Season 20 Quotes
Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes • Lost Verizon • Double, Double, Boy in Trouble • Treehouse of Horror XIX • Dangerous Curves • Homer and Lisa Exchange Cross Words • MyPods and Boomsticks • The Burns and the Bees • Lisa the Drama Queen • Take My Life, Please • How the Test Was Won • No Loan Again, Naturally • Gone Maggie Gone • In the Name of the Grandfather • Wedding for Disaster • Eeny Teeny Maya, Moe • The Good, the Sad, and the Drugly • Father Knows Worst • Waverly Hills 9-0-2-1-D'oh • Four Great Women and a Manicure • Coming to Homerica