One Flew Over the Retirement Castle/Quotes
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- Homer: Go on, boy. Your report's not going to write itself.
- Bart: Can't I just copy stuff out of an encyclopedia and rent a costume? It's not just Grampa. It's all those old people. They're depressing!
- Homer: That's why they're the perfect ones to talk to about the great depression!
- Bart: I have to do a report for school.
- Grampa: What? Did you get lost on the way to the library?
- Bart: No, my report is about you.
- Jasper Beardsley: You're gonna get and di... for de-mentia!
- Old Jewish man: Hee-hee-hee!
- Grampa: Pipe down before I play ya some chin music.
- Grampa: Say, I got just what you need right here... this is Smitty's stuff.
- Jasper: He took the big nap last week.
- Bart: Smitty died? Sorry, guys.
- Jasper: Ah, he had a good run. He fought in two wars. Almost made it three.
- Grampa: He fought the kaiser, the fuhrer, and when he tried to reenlist during Vietnam, those hippies runnin' the army in '67 said he was too old.
- Bart: Does she always treat you like this?
- Grampa: Yeah, most people do.
- Old Jewish man: Just because there's some gray in your beard, people assume you can't do nothin' no more.
- Bart: I admit it. I was wrong about you old dudes. You're cool! You deserve more than this. I say we "worthless geezers" teach that nurse a lesson. Who's with me?
- Grampa: I am.
- Jasper: Me too!
- Old Jewish man: Ditto!
- Disco Stu: Ding-dong-ding! I'm here to pick up my sweet young thing.
- Jasper: You're the great fella she's waiting for?
- Disco Stu: One look at the menu and the ladies always order Disco Stu.