Difference between revisions of "Split Decisions/Quotes"

Latest revision as of 10:27, September 3, 2026

Professor Frink: [AHEM!] I shan't be gone long, my spikey-haired assistant. It is but a one-hour sale at Flem's House of Capacitors, thus all that is required of you is to man the fortifications until my return. [FLOIN-HEY!]

Bart: No problemo, Professor Frink. I'm sure I'll find something to keep me busy.

Professor Frink: Touch nothing, Bart! Need I remind you that this room houses forces with which mere mortals should fear to meddle?!

Bart: Geez, man. Break just one nuclear containment unit, and you never hear the end of it!

Professor Frink: A word to the wise, my boy. [WOO-HOY!]

Bart: Heh! Good advice... if anybody was listening, Nerdzilla!

Bart: All I got was multi... but that means there's two of me...

Bart Copy 1: Three!

Bart: ...three of me to have some fun with.

Bart Copy 1: I've decided to wait for Frinkman to get back.

Bart Copy 2: I've decided to not!

Bart Copy 3: I've decided not to not.

Bart Copy 4: Oooh, shiny!

Bart: That's it! Every time I gotta make a decision... ...I become enough me's to cover every choice. Complete gratification. Cool!

Bart: So, in theory, I could see some big, fat target up ahead... ...and do the completely right thing by passing him by... Hiya, Moe!

Moe Szyslak: Your youthful enthusiasm makes me sick, punk! Ow!

Bart Copy: Heh heh!

Bart: ...but still get complete alternate-self-satisfaction by taking him down!

Lisa: Well, this is a pickle! Which homework should I do first?

Lisa: --Physics?

Lisa Copy: --Biology?

Lisa and Lisa Copy: They're both so much fun!

Lisa: [GASP!]

Lisa Copy: How is this possible?

Lisa: I don't know...

Lisa Copy: ...except now we can do both at the same time together!

Moe: How come there's still only one of you, Flanders?

Chief Wiggum: Yeah, every time one of us makes a choice there are more of us... except for you!

Ned Flanders: Well, gosh-a-roonie, guys, I leave the decisions up to the Great Decider in the sky. I haven't made a choice in years.

Bart: Math isn't exactly my best subject... ...but if every new me splits into more me's with every decision... ...and then those me's also split... ...and so on and so forth... ...uhm, carry the three, divided by seven... ...pretty soon, everybody's going to decide they wanna kill me, creating decision-duplicates that'll decide to do just that! Aye, carumba!

Bart Copy: There I am! Get me!

Bart: Are they gone?

Professor Frink: Every last one of them! But tell me, Bart, how did you decide to make that jump without causing an alternate-decision you to be created?!

Bart: Are you kidding, Professor? It's not like I had a choice... those guys were gonna kill me.

Professor Frink: Well, I hope you learned your lesson, Bart!

Bart: I sure did, Frinkazoid. I learned some people can get enough of a good thing. So, what else've you got that I can monkey around with?

Professor Frink: Oh, for glavin's sake!