Difference between revisions of "Wood Powered"

Latest revision as of 13:06, January 10, 2026

Wood Powered

Tapped Out Quest Information Level: 5 Update: Snow Place Like the Woods Required characters: Paula Optional characters: Patty, Selma, Stephanie Brockman Internal name(s): WoodPowered ID(s): 275030 - 275033

Wood Powered is a premium questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Snow Place Like the Woods content update. It requires Paula to be obtained.

Dialogue[edit]

Pt. 1[edit]

After tapping on Paula's exclamation mark Patty! Selma! How have you been? Paula! What a surprise. So good to see you again! We're fine, thanks. Still working our dead-end jobs at the DMV. Pretending to be busy. Infuriating people waiting in line... Life's going great! So how's the wood chopp'n competition circuit been treating you? Won a few, lost a few. Hey, have they ever figured out how much wood would a woodchuck chuck? *laughs* *laughs* Funny. I'm often asked that. But right now I'd like to know why the woodchuck chucks. Feeling burned out? Yeah, I came to Springfield for a break. Wanted to visit your sister, Marge. She still with what's his name? Homer? Marge says she can't leave him out of love. We all know it's the gravitational pull. *laughs* If Patty is owned: Task: "Make Patty Tell Embarassing Stories About Homer". The job takes place at She-She Lounge, Seething Sisters, Curl Up and Dye, Draggle Rock, or an Eatery and takes 4 hours. If Selma is owned: Task: "Make Selma Point Out More of Homer's Flaws". The job takes place at She-She Lounge, Seething Sisters, Curl Up and Dye, Draggle Rock, or an Eatery and takes 4 hours. Task: "Make Paula Be Mildly Uncomfortable About All This". The job takes place at She-She Lounge, Seething Sisters, Curl Up and Dye, Draggle Rock, or an Eatery and takes 4 hours. Patty! Selma! What brings you two here? A friend wanted to come say hi now that she's in the area... Ta-da! Hi, Marge! Oh Paula! How have you been? Okay. How's your swing been lately? Oh I don't get any more timber time. The only chopping I do around here is celery for soup stocks. I get it. Me, I'm taking a break from competitions. My wife insisted I relax a bit. She found me sleepwalking trying to chop down our Christmas tree. Sleeplogging is a real issue in the chopping community. I'm organizing a march to raise money for a cure. Be sure you also raise awareness. Oh yes! That too! Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 2[edit]

After tapping on Paula's exclamation mark Well, my axe head flew off and knocked out one of my opponents. I wasn't going to give up, so I just picked up that axe head and started swinging it. Wow! I lost, but it was satisfying trying to punch a log in half. Ahh, makes me want to get back in there...attacking trees. Yeah, well, I can't stay any longer. My flight back to Portland leaves early tomorrow morning, and I hate airplanes. Other people get to work on their computers. Why can't I bring a log to chop in my seat? Can't even whittle! Well, it was lovely to see you. Hey, you mind if I reach out to you one of these days for some tandem sawing over video? I'd love to! Woo hoo! Homer? What happened? Big ice storm is coming! Everything's shutting down tonight, even the power plant! That's not good. Marge, any day I'm not overseeing the safety of that plant is a good day for everyone. Task: "Make Paula Pull Up Airline Schedules on Her Phone". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 4 hours. Dang! This ice storm has cancelled all the flights for tomorrow. It'll be early next week before anything's flying out of Springfield Airport in the right direction. Maybe you could take a flight in the opposite direction around the world. Oh, Marge, you round-earther! *annoyed grumble* Paula, you're welcome to stay here until things clear up. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 3[edit]

After tapping on Paula's exclamation mark Yes, babe, I'll let you know as soon as I get a confirmed flight. Love you, too. Bye. Still no flights? Yup. Springfield Airport is under a foot of snow and its snowplow is under fifty. That's too bad. Yeah, and I'd planned to start working out again next week. I suppose I'll have to start training here. You mind loaning me your axe? Be my guest. I just re-handled it and the blade is sharp enough to cut through a three foot stack of Playdudes in one swing! Don't ask me how I know that. Task: "Make Paula Lumber-Jog". The job takes 4 hours. ...with temperatures reaching well below zero, health officials urge everyone to remain inside. Joining us now, outside, is Stephanie! On location from the Isotopes Football Stadium, for an update on sports. Kent, I'm standing on what should be a field covered in injured men. Instead, it is covered in ice. In fact, with everyone staying warm inside, the only news is that my legs have become two solid pillars of frozen meat. Yet another illustration for our listeners of the importance of avoiding all outside activities. To coin a phrase, it seems that all sports are frozen for the time being. Yes, Kent. There's nothing happening here. There's no one out here. Just me with my microphone frozen to my hand. Err...wait, Stephanie. Who's that behind you? If I can snap this ice encasing my neck to see... Yes, it appears to be a woman jogging on the ice with an axe! Give me five minutes, Kent. Sure, it's not like we're live or anything. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Pt. 4[edit]

After tapping on Paula's exclamation mark Springfield, allow me to introduce Paula, a professional lumberjack! I'm sorry, it's lumberjill. Excuse me? It's lumberjill. Not lumberjack. I'm a woman. Ah, I see you're as good at splitting hairs as you are at splitting logs! ... So, Paula, what brings you outside on a frigid day like this? Practice. I'm gearing up for competition. Problem is, it's so cold the trees tend to shatter when I take a whack at them. Fascinating. Do you mind giving our warm-at-home viewers a little taste of your skills? Hell, I'll give them a whole belly full. Stand back, buttercup. Task: "Make Paula Practice Splitting Logs". The job takes 4 hours. If Stephanie Brockman is owned: Task: "Make Stephanie Brockman Watch Too Attentively". The job takes place at Isotope Stadium, Trees, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours. Fascinating! Did you see that, Kent? Enthralling! Portland Woman Splits Wood. I smell a Pulitzer Prize. Okay, well here's a news flash, Kent. The weather report calls for increasing coldness in shoulders towards certain husbands. That's...a very specific weather report. Well, there you have it! Channel Five's very own Stephanie Brockman reporting from the field. Thanks Stephanie! Err...can I...go now? After you break the ice locking me in place here. Quest reward: 200 and 20