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[[File:Artie Ziff.png|135px|left|link=Artie Ziff]]
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[[File:Derren Brown.png|150px|right|link=Derren Brown (character)]]
  
'''Artie Ziff''' was [[Marge Simpson]]'s high school prom date and former billionaire.
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'''Derren Brown''' is an English mentalist, illusionist, and writer.
  
Artie is very confident yet nerdy, self-centered and pretentious, believing himself to be the best at everything - he said that it "would damage the town" if Marge told people about his "busy hands", and once imagined a can-can chorus and audience made up entirely of himself. He is Jewish, and once commented that if people don't like him it's because they're Anti-Semitic. He holds a deep obsession over Marge, and has done so since high school: His appearances mainly revolve around his plans to seduce her away from [[Homer]], with the exception of his final encounter with the Simpson family.
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Derren Brown went to [[Springfield]] to film ''[[A Derren Brown Christmas]]''. He chose Springfield because there was no feeling of [[Christmas]] spirit in the town. So that he wouldn't reveal what he was really doing to the townspeople, he told [[Mayor Quimby]] and the people of Springfield that the town had won an award for being the "Christmasiest" Town in America, and he and [[Hark Media]] were there to film a documentary about it. After getting permission to film, Derren Brown focused on his first target, [[Gil Gunderson]]. Derren set up a stunt involving a baby carriage rolling down a hill toward Gil, who stopped it and supposedly saved the baby inside. However, the baby was placed in the carriage after it was stopped. Upon being told that he had saved the baby, Gil phoned his estranged wife [[Bonnie]] and was told he could spend Christmas with the family.
  
Artie was a student at [[Springfield High School]]. He was a member of the school Debate Team (where Homer mooned him for rebuttal), and at the end of the year took Marge to the prom. He ruined a wonderful evening with his "busy hands" in the back of his car, his urges resulting in the shoulder strap of Marge's dress being torn, followed by a slap to the face and a swift end to their date. He drove Marge home.
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Derren Brown then targeted [[Homer]], as Homer believed he was terrible at buying gifts for people. After hypnotizing [[Marge]] into giving permission to work on Homer, Derren Brown set his plan in motion. When Homer went to work the next day, he went to the vending machine where his favorite cupcakes had a festive makeover, with a picture of [[Santa Claus]] on the packet. Homer tried to buy them but was sucked into the vending machine and into a hidden room where Derren Brown hypnotized him. However, Homer proved difficult to hypnotize, as he was still focused on the cupcakes. Derren Brown placed the cupcake packet on his forehead to get Homer to pay attention and attempted to hypnotize Homer into believing he was good at buying gifts. However, seeing the picture of Santa Claus, Homer was hypnotized into thinking he was Santa. He then managed to get one of the cupcakes without Derren noticing...
  
Many years later, Artie was revealed to have become a software billionaire, becoming the fifth richest man in the country. His wealth came from a device that transformed {{w|Modem|modem}} noise into easy listening music. Despite his riches, Artie's life was not complete: He lived alone, and the collection of Marge-resembling art around his mansion showed that he never got over Marge's rejecting him on prom night...
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Latest revision as of 15:02, December 1, 2025

Derren Brown.png

Derren Brown is an English mentalist, illusionist, and writer.

Derren Brown went to Springfield to film A Derren Brown Christmas. He chose Springfield because there was no feeling of Christmas spirit in the town. So that he wouldn't reveal what he was really doing to the townspeople, he told Mayor Quimby and the people of Springfield that the town had won an award for being the "Christmasiest" Town in America, and he and Hark Media were there to film a documentary about it. After getting permission to film, Derren Brown focused on his first target, Gil Gunderson. Derren set up a stunt involving a baby carriage rolling down a hill toward Gil, who stopped it and supposedly saved the baby inside. However, the baby was placed in the carriage after it was stopped. Upon being told that he had saved the baby, Gil phoned his estranged wife Bonnie and was told he could spend Christmas with the family.

Derren Brown then targeted Homer, as Homer believed he was terrible at buying gifts for people. After hypnotizing Marge into giving permission to work on Homer, Derren Brown set his plan in motion. When Homer went to work the next day, he went to the vending machine where his favorite cupcakes had a festive makeover, with a picture of Santa Claus on the packet. Homer tried to buy them but was sucked into the vending machine and into a hidden room where Derren Brown hypnotized him. However, Homer proved difficult to hypnotize, as he was still focused on the cupcakes. Derren Brown placed the cupcake packet on his forehead to get Homer to pay attention and attempted to hypnotize Homer into believing he was good at buying gifts. However, seeing the picture of Santa Claus, Homer was hypnotized into thinking he was Santa. He then managed to get one of the cupcakes without Derren noticing...

Read more of this article | More featured articles | Vote for a featured article