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Difference between revisions of "Radio Bart/Quotes"
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− | {{TabQ | + | {{TabQ}} |
− | {{ | + | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|I Married Marge|Lisa the Greek}} |
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− | + | :''[Looking for a snack, [[Homer]] finds several containers of {{W|Neapolitan ice cream}} in the freezer.]'' | |
− | ''[ | + | {{qf|[[Homer]]}} ''[in anticipation]'' Mmmm... chocolate! |
− | + | :''[Homer opens the container and the chocolate ice cream is all gone. The strawberry and vanilla, however, are completely untouched.]'' | |
− | ''[ | + | {{qf|Homer}} D'oh! ''[tries another container]'' Mmmm... chocolate! ''[same results]'' D'oh! |
− | '' | + | :''[Homer checks the rest of the containers and they're all the same: Chocolate all gone and strawberry and vanilla untouched.]'' |
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+ | {{qf|Homer}} ''[hollering]'' Marge! We need some more vanilla, chocolate and strawberry ice cream! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[Bart plays his first prank with the [[Superstar Celebrity Microphone]]. The victim is | + | :''[Bart plays his first prank with the [[Superstar Celebrity Microphone]]. The victim is Homer.]'' |
− | + | {{qf|[[Bart]]}} ''[on radio]'' People of Earth, this is Bartron, commander of the Martian invasion force. Your planet is in our hands. Resistance is useless. We have captured your President. He was delicious! | |
− | ''[Homer screams, runs out of the kitchen, and fetches a shotgun.]'' | + | :''[Homer screams, runs out of the kitchen, and fetches a shotgun.]'' |
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[Bart and his microphone strike again. This time the victims are | + | :''[Bart and his microphone strike again. This time the victims are Rod and Todd Flanders.]'' |
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− | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[on radio]'' Rod! Todd! This is God! | |
+ | {{qf|[[Rod]]}} How did you get on the radio? | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} Whaddya mean, 'How did I get on the radio?' I created the universe! Stupid kid. | ||
− | + | :''[Rod and Todd quickly fall to their kness and clasp their hands.]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Todd]]}} Forgive my brother, we believe you! | |
+ | {{qf|Bart}} Talk is cheap. Here is a test of your faith. Walk through the wall; I will remove it for you! | ||
− | + | :''[Rod makes the attempt and walks into the wall.]'' | |
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− | ''[ | ||
− | ''' | + | {{qf|Bart}} Later. ''[laughs]'' |
+ | {{qf|Todd}} What do you want from us? | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} I got a job for you. Bring forth all the cookies from your kitchen and leave them on the Simpsons' porch. | ||
+ | {{qf|Rod}} But those cookies belong to our parents! | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} ''[grumbles]'' Look, do you want a happy God or a vengeful God? | ||
+ | {{qf|Todd}} ''[quickly]'' Happy God! | ||
+ | {{qf|Bart}} Then quit flapping your lip and make with the cookies! | ||
+ | {{qf|Rod and Todd}} Yes, sir! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[ | + | :''[After hearing [[Timmy O'Toole]]'s voice in the well, Groundskeeper Willie leaps onto his tractor and drives to town for help.]'' |
− | + | {{qf|[[Willie]]}} ''[cutting several cars off]'' Outta my way! Look out, ya horse's ass! | |
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[ | + | :''[In an interview with Kent Brockman, Krusty the Clown tells the story of the making of "[[We're Sending Our Love Down the Well]]."]'' |
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− | '' | + | {{qf|[[Krusty]]}} I called my good friend Sting. He said, 'Krusty, when do you need me?' I said, 'Thursday.' He said, 'I'm busy Thursday.' I said, 'What about Friday?' He said, 'Friday's worse than Thursday.' Then '''he''' said, 'How about Saturday?' I said, 'Fine.' True story! |
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[ | + | :''[After falling into the well, Bart confesses his prank to [[Springfield Police]] officers Lou and Eddie.]'' |
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− | ''' | + | {{qf|Bart}} Look, I'll level with you. There is no Timmy O'Toole. It was just a prank I was playing on everybody. |
+ | {{qf|[[Lou]]}} Well you sure fooled us, kid. | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Eddie]]}} Hey, I've got an idea for a prank. Let's go home and go to sleep. | ||
− | ''' | + | :''[They laugh and walk away, leaving Bart in the well.]'' |
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[ | + | :''[On [[Channel 6 News]], Kent Brockman interviews Homer and Marge about Bart's being stuck in the well.]'' |
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− | ''' | + | {{qf|[[Kent]]}} The time has come for finger-pointing, and most of them are squarely aimed at the boy's parents. |
+ | {{qf|Homer}} It's not our fault! We didn't want the boy, he was an accident! | ||
+ | {{qf|[[Marge]]}} ''[indignantly]'' Homer!!! | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} Uh ... Could you edit that last part out? | ||
+ | {{qf|Kent}} Mr. Simpson, we're live, coast-to-coast! | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} D'oh! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''[ | + | :''[Led by Homer, a group of townspeople work to dig [[Bart]] out of the well after the city of [[Springfield]] refuses to help.]'' |
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− | + | {{qf|[[Apu]]}} The canary! | |
+ | {{qf|Willie}} Gas!! Out of the hole! | ||
− | + | :''[Everyone runs out of the well in panic. Dr. Hibbert performs a quick autopsy on the dead canary.]'' | |
− | + | {{qf|[[Dr. Hibbert]]}} Gentlemen, this canary died of natural causes. | |
+ | {{qf|Willie}} Back in the hole! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | :''[Also joining in the effort to rescue Bart is Sting.]'' | |
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− | '' | + | {{qf|Marge}} Sting, you look tired. Maybe you should take a rest. |
+ | {{qf|{{Ch|Sting}}}} Not while one of my fans needs me. | ||
+ | {{qf|Marge}} Actually, I don't know if I've ever heard Bart play one of your albums. | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} ''[shushing Marge]'' Sssshhhh!! Marge, he's a good digger! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''' | + | {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Dad, can I have some money to buy Bart a birthday present? |
+ | {{qf|Homer}} Here you go. | ||
+ | {{qf|Lisa}} ''[counts the money]'' Dad, this is $110! | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} Oh, sorry. ''[gives her his wallet]'' | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|Falcon Man}} Grasping the child firmly in his talons, {{ap|Socrates|falcon}} here will fly him to safety! Just watch. ''[The falcon is released and flies away.]'' I don't think he's coming back. | |
---- | ---- | ||
− | + | {{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} I'm afraid we've got a budget problem, Marge. Your boy picked a bad time to fall down a well. If he had done it at the beginning of the fiscal year, no problemo. | |
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− | + | {{qf|Homer}} That little Timmy is a real hero. | |
− | + | {{qf|Lisa}} What makes him a hero, Dad? | |
− | ' | + | {{qf|Homer}} Well, he fell down the well and ... can't get out. |
+ | {{qf|Lisa}} How does that make him a hero? | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} Well, it's more than you did! | ||
---- | ---- | ||
− | ''' | + | {{qf|Bart}} ''[at the barber shop, getting a shave]'' Digital audio tape, my butt! When I was a kid, we had compact disks, and I don't recall no one complaining. |
+ | {{qf|Barber}} Damn right. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
+ | {{qf|Homer}} Don't worry, son. Just 'cuz you're trapped in a hole doesn't mean you can't live a rich and full life. | ||
− | {{Season 3 Q}} | + | {{Season 3|Q}} |
Latest revision as of 09:06, February 3, 2024
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- [Looking for a snack, Homer finds several containers of Neapolitan ice cream in the freezer.]
- Homer: [in anticipation] Mmmm... chocolate!
- [Homer opens the container and the chocolate ice cream is all gone. The strawberry and vanilla, however, are completely untouched.]
- Homer: D'oh! [tries another container] Mmmm... chocolate! [same results] D'oh!
- [Homer checks the rest of the containers and they're all the same: Chocolate all gone and strawberry and vanilla untouched.]
- Homer: [hollering] Marge! We need some more vanilla, chocolate and strawberry ice cream!
- [Bart plays his first prank with the Superstar Celebrity Microphone. The victim is Homer.]
- Bart: [on radio] People of Earth, this is Bartron, commander of the Martian invasion force. Your planet is in our hands. Resistance is useless. We have captured your President. He was delicious!
- [Homer screams, runs out of the kitchen, and fetches a shotgun.]
- [Bart and his microphone strike again. This time the victims are Rod and Todd Flanders.]
- Bart: [on radio] Rod! Todd! This is God!
- Rod: How did you get on the radio?
- Bart: Whaddya mean, 'How did I get on the radio?' I created the universe! Stupid kid.
- [Rod and Todd quickly fall to their kness and clasp their hands.]
- Todd: Forgive my brother, we believe you!
- Bart: Talk is cheap. Here is a test of your faith. Walk through the wall; I will remove it for you!
- [Rod makes the attempt and walks into the wall.]
- Bart: Later. [laughs]
- Todd: What do you want from us?
- Bart: I got a job for you. Bring forth all the cookies from your kitchen and leave them on the Simpsons' porch.
- Rod: But those cookies belong to our parents!
- Bart: [grumbles] Look, do you want a happy God or a vengeful God?
- Todd: [quickly] Happy God!
- Bart: Then quit flapping your lip and make with the cookies!
- Rod and Todd: Yes, sir!
- [After hearing Timmy O'Toole's voice in the well, Groundskeeper Willie leaps onto his tractor and drives to town for help.]
- Willie: [cutting several cars off] Outta my way! Look out, ya horse's ass!
- [In an interview with Kent Brockman, Krusty the Clown tells the story of the making of "We're Sending Our Love Down the Well."]
- Krusty: I called my good friend Sting. He said, 'Krusty, when do you need me?' I said, 'Thursday.' He said, 'I'm busy Thursday.' I said, 'What about Friday?' He said, 'Friday's worse than Thursday.' Then he said, 'How about Saturday?' I said, 'Fine.' True story!
- [After falling into the well, Bart confesses his prank to Springfield Police officers Lou and Eddie.]
- Bart: Look, I'll level with you. There is no Timmy O'Toole. It was just a prank I was playing on everybody.
- Lou: Well you sure fooled us, kid.
- Eddie: Hey, I've got an idea for a prank. Let's go home and go to sleep.
- [They laugh and walk away, leaving Bart in the well.]
- [On Channel 6 News, Kent Brockman interviews Homer and Marge about Bart's being stuck in the well.]
- Kent: The time has come for finger-pointing, and most of them are squarely aimed at the boy's parents.
- Homer: It's not our fault! We didn't want the boy, he was an accident!
- Marge: [indignantly] Homer!!!
- Homer: Uh ... Could you edit that last part out?
- Kent: Mr. Simpson, we're live, coast-to-coast!
- Homer: D'oh!
- [Led by Homer, a group of townspeople work to dig Bart out of the well after the city of Springfield refuses to help.]
- Apu: The canary!
- Willie: Gas!! Out of the hole!
- [Everyone runs out of the well in panic. Dr. Hibbert performs a quick autopsy on the dead canary.]
- Dr. Hibbert: Gentlemen, this canary died of natural causes.
- Willie: Back in the hole!
- [Also joining in the effort to rescue Bart is Sting.]
- Marge: Sting, you look tired. Maybe you should take a rest.
- Sting: Not while one of my fans needs me.
- Marge: Actually, I don't know if I've ever heard Bart play one of your albums.
- Homer: [shushing Marge] Sssshhhh!! Marge, he's a good digger!
- Lisa: Dad, can I have some money to buy Bart a birthday present?
- Homer: Here you go.
- Lisa: [counts the money] Dad, this is $110!
- Homer: Oh, sorry. [gives her his wallet]
- Falcon Man: Grasping the child firmly in his talons, Socrates here will fly him to safety! Just watch. [The falcon is released and flies away.] I don't think he's coming back.
- Chief Wiggum: I'm afraid we've got a budget problem, Marge. Your boy picked a bad time to fall down a well. If he had done it at the beginning of the fiscal year, no problemo.
- Homer: That little Timmy is a real hero.
- Lisa: What makes him a hero, Dad?
- Homer: Well, he fell down the well and ... can't get out.
- Lisa: How does that make him a hero?
- Homer: Well, it's more than you did!
- Bart: [at the barber shop, getting a shave] Digital audio tape, my butt! When I was a kid, we had compact disks, and I don't recall no one complaining.
- Barber: Damn right.
- Homer: Don't worry, son. Just 'cuz you're trapped in a hole doesn't mean you can't live a rich and full life.