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Difference between revisions of "Wrong Side of the Haw-Haw"

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(Created page with "{{Tapped Out Quest |name = Wrong Side of the Haw-Haw |image = x100px |level = 9 |update = {{TOCU|Fears of a Clown}} |...")
 
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|update = {{TOCU|Fears of a Clown}}
 
|update = {{TOCU|Fears of a Clown}}
 
|requirements =  
 
|requirements =  
−
|characters =  
+
|characters = [[Lisa]], [[Homer]]
−
|optional =  
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|optional = [[Marge]], [[Skinner]], [[Little Debbie Dimples]], [[Clown Principal Krusty]], [[Clown Bart]], [[Judge Snyder]], See [[#Currency-earning jobs|Currency-earning jobs]]
 
|internal = WrongSideOfTheHawHaw
 
|internal = WrongSideOfTheHawHaw
 
|id = 277013 - 277018
 
|id = 277013 - 277018
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{{TB|How many zeros do I have to put on this check to make things right?}}
 
{{TB|How many zeros do I have to put on this check to make things right?}}
 
{{Tapped Out Clown Principal Krusty Icon|Confused}}
 
{{Tapped Out Clown Principal Krusty Icon|Confused}}
−
{{TB|Uh…six?}}
+
{{TB|Uh...six?}}
 
{{Tapped Out Wolfcastle Icon}}
 
{{Tapped Out Wolfcastle Icon}}
 
{{TB|Nine!}}
 
{{TB|Nine!}}
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{{Tapped Out Clown Principal Krusty Icon|Sneaky}}
 
{{Tapped Out Clown Principal Krusty Icon|Sneaky}}
 
{{TB|If, by the "right thing" you mean cashing Wolfcastle's check, then I'll do the right thing every time.}}
 
{{TB|If, by the "right thing" you mean cashing Wolfcastle's check, then I'll do the right thing every time.}}
−
{{THT|{{Task|Collect Unicycles|155}}<br>{{Task|Watch Clown Performances|5}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Principal Krusty Head to Court|4 hours|the [[Court House]], [[International Court of Justice]], [[Town Hall]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Principal Krusty]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Little Debbie Dimples Follow Krusty|4 hours|the [[Court House]], [[International Court of Justice]], [[Town Hall]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Little Debbie Dimples]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Bart Smell His Clothes|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Bart]]}}<br>{{Task/Job|Make Homer Be Oblivious to Shame|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}}}|colspan=2}}
+
{{THT|{{Task|Collect Unicycles|155}}<br>{{Task|Watch Clown Performances|5}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Principal Krusty Head to Court|4 hours|the [[Court House]], [[International Court of Justice]], [[Town Hall]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Principal Krusty]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Little Debbie Dimples Follow Krusty|4 hours|the [[Court House]], [[International Court of Justice]], [[Town Hall]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Little Debbie Dimples]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Bart Smell His Clothes|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studio Office]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Bart]]}}<br>{{Task/Job|Make Homer Be Oblivious to Shame|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studio Office]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}}}|colspan=2}}
 
{{THT|Quest reward: {{Cash|100}} and {{XP|10}}<br>{{GBT|1}}|colspan=2}}
 
{{THT|Quest reward: {{Cash|100}} and {{XP|10}}<br>{{GBT|1}}|colspan=2}}
 
}}
 
}}
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{{TB|The plaintiffs claim that clowning isn't educational. But if you can get them to laugh, you will have taught them a valuable lesson, and, ipso facto, I will dismiss the case.}}
 
{{TB|The plaintiffs claim that clowning isn't educational. But if you can get them to laugh, you will have taught them a valuable lesson, and, ipso facto, I will dismiss the case.}}
 
{{Tapped Out Blue-Haired Lawyer Icon|Confused}}
 
{{Tapped Out Blue-Haired Lawyer Icon|Confused}}
−
{{TB|With all due respect, Judge, is this…uh…legal?}}
+
{{TB|With all due respect, Judge, is this...uh...legal?}}
 
{{Tapped Out Judge Snyder Icon}}
 
{{Tapped Out Judge Snyder Icon}}
 
{{TB|I said, "ipso facto".}}
 
{{TB|I said, "ipso facto".}}
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{{TB|It's that or close down the school.}}
 
{{TB|It's that or close down the school.}}
 
{{Tapped Out Homer Icon|Pained}}
 
{{Tapped Out Homer Icon|Pained}}
−
{{TB|Please don't close down the school. Please oh please oh please oh please…}}
+
{{TB|Please don't close down the school. Please oh please oh please oh please...}}
 
{{Tapped Out Little Debbie Dimples Icon}}
 
{{Tapped Out Little Debbie Dimples Icon}}
 
{{TB|I'll tell you one thing: I'm not going back to six kid birthday parties per weekend. I hate kids. No offense, kids.}}
 
{{TB|I'll tell you one thing: I'm not going back to six kid birthday parties per weekend. I hate kids. No offense, kids.}}
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{{Tapped Out Sophie Krustofsky Icon|Annoyed}}
 
{{Tapped Out Sophie Krustofsky Icon|Annoyed}}
 
{{TB|Tell me about it.}}
 
{{TB|Tell me about it.}}
−
{{THT|{{Task|Collect Unicycles|195}}<br>{{Task|Watch Clown Performances|5}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Principal Krusty Prepare for Trial|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Principal Krusty]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Little Debbie Dimples Prepare for Trial|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Little Debbie Dimples]]}}<br>{{Task/Job|Make Homer Continue Begging|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}}}|colspan=2}}
+
{{THT|{{Task|Collect Unicycles|195}}<br>{{Task|Watch Clown Performances|5}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Clown Principal Krusty Prepare for Trial|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studio Office]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Clown Principal Krusty]]}}<br>{{Task/Optional|Make Little Debbie Dimples Prepare for Trial|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studio Office]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}|char=[[Little Debbie Dimples]]}}<br>{{Task/Job|Make Homer Continue Begging|4 hours|[[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Krustylu Studio Office]], [[Krustylu Studios]], [[Krusty's Mansion]], [[Krusty Burger]], or a {{TOG|Home Visitable|Visitable Home}}}}|colspan=2}}
 
{{THT|Quest reward: {{Cash|200}} and {{XP|20}}<br>[[Ms. Coco]]|colspan=2}}
 
{{THT|Quest reward: {{Cash|200}} and {{XP|20}}<br>[[Ms. Coco]]|colspan=2}}
 +
}}
 +
 +
== Currency-earning jobs ==
 +
{{Table|
 +
{{THT|Task}}
 +
{{TH|Character(s)}}
 +
{{TH|Time}}
 +
{{TH|Location(s)}}
 +
{{TH|Reward|width=200px}}
 +
{{TBT|Check Bike Stores for Unicycles}}
 +
{{TB|[[Homer]], [[Marge]], [[Lisa]], [[Grampa]], [[Rev. Lovejoy]], [[Wiggum]], [[Skinner]], [[Willie]]}}
 +
{{TRs|4h|2}}
 +
{{TB|[[Armistead's Mopeds]], [[Simpson and Grandson Bike Customizing]], [[Brown House]]}}
 +
{{TB|{{Unicycle|5}}, {{XP|45}}}}
 +
{{TBT|Buy Brand New Unicycles}}
 +
{{TB|[[Dieter Wolfcastle]], [[Clown Bart]], [[Clown Principal Krusty]], [[Ring-A-Ling]], [[The Flying Giuseppe]]}}
 +
{{TB|[[Hello Krusty]], [[Heyus Heyus]], [[School for the Clowning Arts]], [[Brown House]]}}
 +
{{TB|{{Unicycle|8}}, {{XP|70}}}}
 
}}
 
}}
  
 
{{Tapped Out Quests/Fears of a Clown}}
 
{{Tapped Out Quests/Fears of a Clown}}

Latest revision as of 16:47, January 23, 2026


Wrong Side of the Haw-Haw
Tapped Out Wrong Side of the Haw-Haw Sidebar.png
Tapped Out Quest Information
Level: 9
Update: Fears of a Clown
Required characters: Lisa, Homer
Optional characters: Marge, Skinner, Little Debbie Dimples, Clown Principal Krusty, Clown Bart, Judge Snyder, See Currency-earning jobs
Internal name(s): WrongSideOfTheHawHaw
ID(s): 277013 - 277018
Previous quest(s): Belly Up
Next quest(s): Head Over Banana Peels


Wrong Side of the Haw-Haw is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Fears of a Clown content update.

Dialogue[edit]

Pt. 1[edit]

Between February 25, 2024 and March 13, 2024
Marge Did you hear about the Springfield versus Krusty lawsuit?
Lisa - Curious The one that claims that Krusty Burger patties don't qualify as meat?
Marge No, the one that claims that the Clowning Arts don't qualify as educational.
Lisa - Thoughtful Huh. I wonder who filed it?
Skinner - Stern That would be me. Clowning's got no business in a school curriculum.
Lisa - Suspicious That seems extreme. Also, what are you doing in our kitchen?
Skinner The school board won't let us serve Krusty Burgers in the cafeteria, so I need to borrow your mother's recipe file.
Task: "Collect Unicycles" (x115).
Task: "Watch Clown Performances" (x5).
Task: "Make Lisa Back Away". The job takes place at the Simpson House or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Marge is owned: Task: "Make Marge Sort Recipe Cards". The job takes place at the Simpson House or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Skinner is owned: Task: "Make Skinner Review Marge's Recipe File". The job takes place at Springfield Elementary, Springfield High School, Shelbyville Elementary, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Clown Bart - Annoyed Look, Skinner, I know that you and I don't see eye-to-eye all the time. Or, well, ever. But you gotta drop this lawsuit.
Skinner - Annoyed No can do, Simpson. Clowns can't be trusted. And it's not up to me. Reverend Lovejoy and Chief Wiggum are also part of the suit on behalf of church and state.
Rev. Lovejoy - Serious The road to Hell is paved with clowning. In the form of banana peels of sin. And Hell is controlled by Satan — the Clown Prince of...Clowning.
Wiggum - Serious Lookit kid, clowning is a gateway drug. And that leads to real drugs. And real gateways. Probably.
Ralph - Happy Face paint tastes like asbestos!
Rev. Lovejoy - Annoyed You see? The gateways are already open!
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10
Pie Wall

Pt. 2[edit]

After completing Pt. 1
Clown Principal Krusty Well, we had a good run, but it looks like it's time to pack it in.
Little Debbie Dimples - Confused You mean you're just going to give up?
Clown Principal Krusty Seems logical. Have you seen the rent on this school?
Little Debbie Dimples - Annoyed So this was just about the money, huh?
Clown Principal Krusty - Annoyed Look, the whole town is against me. What do you expect me to do?
Little Debbie Dimples I expect you to fight for all the future clowns in this city. Isn't that what we set out to do in the first place?
Clown Principal Krusty - Flirting Actually I thought maybe we'd get lucky along the way. *winks*
Little Debbie Dimples - Annoyed *glares at Krusty*
Clown Principal Krusty - Embarrassed And fight for all the future clowns in this city.
Task: "Collect Unicycles" (x115).
Task: "Watch Clown Performances" (x5).
If Little Debbie Dimples is owned: Task: "Make Little Debbie Dimples Encourage Krusty". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Clown Principal Krusty is owned: Task: "Make Clown Principal Krusty Consider His Options". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Show Up Unannounced". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Homer - Serious Krusty, what's it gonna take to keep this school open and Bart out of my house?
Clown Principal Krusty - Confused I dunno, an act of God?
Rev. Lovejoy Nope. I already called dibs on Him to help me close the school.
Wolfcastle You, Clown Face, is your school still accepting students?
Clown Principal Krusty Sorry, Rainy, enrollment's closed. I've got money problems the size of SBF and SVB put together.
Wolfcastle How many zeros do I have to put on this check to make things right?
Clown Principal Krusty - Confused Uh...six?
Wolfcastle Nine!
Clown Principal Krusty - Confused Was that a counteroffer or are you saying no?
Wolfcastle *writes out check* Here's half a million. Work with it.
Rev. Lovejoy - Annoyed *looking up in the sky* Hey, what's the big idea?
God What can I say? I like his movies.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10
Clown Bus

Pt. 3[edit]

After completing Pt. 2
Wolfcastle This is my son, Dieter. His therapist's psychologist says he needs to spend more time around normal kids.
Dieter Wolfcastle - Annoyed Dad, these kids smell like off-brand clothes.
Clown Bart - Annoyed Homer, I told you not to buy my clothes from CostMo.
Homer Your mother says that's the only place that sells red shirts and blue shorts by the barrel.
Clown Principal Krusty - Happy C'mon, Debbie, it's time to fight City Hall. Or at least County Courthouse. I always get those two buildings confused.
Little Debbie Dimples I'm so proud of you. I knew you'd do the right thing.
Clown Principal Krusty - Sneaky If, by the "right thing" you mean cashing Wolfcastle's check, then I'll do the right thing every time.
Task: "Collect Unicycles" (x155).
Task: "Watch Clown Performances" (x5).
If Clown Principal Krusty is owned: Task: "Make Clown Principal Krusty Head to Court". The job takes place at the Court House, International Court of Justice, Town Hall, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Little Debbie Dimples is owned: Task: "Make Little Debbie Dimples Follow Krusty". The job takes place at the Court House, International Court of Justice, Town Hall, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Clown Bart is owned: Task: "Make Clown Bart Smell His Clothes". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studio Office, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Be Oblivious to Shame". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studio Office, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10
Mystery Box Token1

Pt. 4[edit]

After completing Pt. 3
Judge Snyder Now hearing the case of Springfield versus Krusty. This isn't about the Krusty Burger thing again, is it?
Clown Principal Krusty Not this time, your honor. This is about my School for the Clowning Arts.
Blue-Haired Lawyer That's right, your honor. My clients contend that Krusty's curriculum of clowning, capering, and general jestering does not qualify as educational. Therefore, they request you to revoke the school's license.
Judge Snyder I see. In that case, I call for a trial by amusement.
Clown Principal Krusty - Surprised Trial by amusement!? What's that?
Judge Snyder The plaintiffs claim that clowning isn't educational. But if you can get them to laugh, you will have taught them a valuable lesson, and, ipso facto, I will dismiss the case.
Blue-Haired Lawyer - Confused With all due respect, Judge, is this...uh...legal?
Judge Snyder I said, "ipso facto".
Task: "Collect Unicycles" (x115).
Task: "Watch Clown Performances" (x5).
If Skinner is owned: Task: "Make Skinner Nod Approvingly". The job takes place at the Court House, International Court of Justice, Town Hall, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Clown Principal Krusty is owned: Task: "Make Clown Principal Krusty Scratch His Head". The job takes place at the Court House, International Court of Justice, Town Hall, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Judge Snyder is owned: Task: "Make Judge Snyder Think of Crazier Verdicts". The job takes place at the Court House, International Court of Justice, Town Hall, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Quest reward: Cash100 and XP10
Krusty's Stunt Doubles Autograph Booth

Pt. 5[edit]

After completing Pt. 4
Clown Principal Krusty - Happy Okay, kids, you heard the judge — it's showtime!
Sophie Krustofsky - Confused Are we really going to participate in this trial by amusement?
Clown Principal Krusty It's that or close down the school.
Homer - Pained Please don't close down the school. Please oh please oh please oh please...
Little Debbie Dimples I'll tell you one thing: I'm not going back to six kid birthday parties per weekend. I hate kids. No offense, kids.
Dieter Wolfcastle - Confused Do I have to do anything, or can I just record this on my phone for TMZ?
Clown Principal Krusty With what your father paid, you're gonna be front and center.
Dieter Wolfcastle - Annoyed *crosses arms* Ugh, nepo babies have it so rough.
Sophie Krustofsky - Annoyed Tell me about it.
Task: "Collect Unicycles" (x195).
Task: "Watch Clown Performances" (x5).
If Clown Principal Krusty is owned: Task: "Make Clown Principal Krusty Prepare for Trial". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studio Office, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
If Little Debbie Dimples is owned: Task: "Make Little Debbie Dimples Prepare for Trial". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studio Office, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Task: "Make Homer Continue Begging". The job takes place at School for the Clowning Arts, Krustylu Studio Office, Krustylu Studios, Krusty's Mansion, Krusty Burger, or a Visitable Home and takes 4 hours.
Quest reward: Cash200 and XP20
Ms. Coco

Currency-earning jobs[edit]

Task Character(s) Time Location(s) Reward
Check Bike Stores for Unicycles Homer, Marge, Lisa, Grampa, Rev. Lovejoy, Wiggum, Skinner, Willie 4h Armistead's Mopeds, Simpson and Grandson Bike Customizing, Brown House Unicycle5, XP45
Buy Brand New Unicycles Dieter Wolfcastle, Clown Bart, Clown Principal Krusty, Ring-A-Ling, The Flying Giuseppe Hello Krusty, Heyus Heyus, School for the Clowning Arts, Brown House Unicycle8, XP70


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