https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=Write_Off_This_Episode%2FQuotes 2026-04-03T17:36:31Z Revision history for this page on the wiki MediaWiki 1.29.0 https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?title=Write_Off_This_Episode/Quotes&diff=1208975&oldid=prev 2023-05-02T13:04:38Z

<p>Created page with &quot;{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Fan-ily Feud|The Very Hungry Caterpillars}} {{qf|<a href="/wiki/Homer" class="mw-redirect" title="Homer">Homer</a>}} Come on, lucky ring. You tricked Marge into staying with me, you can do this...&quot;</p> <p><b>New page</b></p><div>{{TabQ|nogags}}<br /> {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Fan-ily Feud|The Very Hungry Caterpillars}}<br /> <br /> {{qf|[[Homer]]}} Come on, lucky ring. You tricked Marge into staying with me, you can do this.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Shouldn't you throw those clothes out?<br /> {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Rather than clean them? Don't rob me of the one part of your dad getting skunk-sprayed I enjoy.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} How come all of these pillowcases are blue?<br /> {{qf|Marge}} I think it's from my hair. Not that I dye my hair. It's natural. It's just such a vibrant natural blue that...<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} It's okay, Mom. The blue's a nice touch.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Gil Gunderson]]}} Ah, hot diggity. I can finally get my old job back as a stock image model for &quot;man in suit.&quot;<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[The Rich Texan]]}} Here's my charitable deduction. I mean donation. I mean both. I love anything that gets me out of taxes.<br /> {{qf|Marge}} [[Texas]]?<br /> {{qf|The Rich Texan}} No, taxes. I hate taxes, but I love Texas 'cause folks in Texas love Texas and hates taxes. No taxing's what Texans stand for.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} Wait, we're using [[Hand &amp; Armor Baking Soda]]? That company is the worst. They support child labor. Even some of their top executives are children.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} I've got a good feeling about the baking soda manufacturer at the top of this mountain.<br /> {{qf|Homer}} Oh, why can't anything good ever be at the bottom of a mountain?<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Marge}} Check out our official symbol. It's the same ribbon we use to tie the blue bags. They've become so popular we've completely run out of ribbons.<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} So what do you tie the bags with?<br /> {{qf|Marge}} Well, we're a little behind in our bag making, but we've been doing something even more important: raising awareness about our bag making.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} I've never been fired before. What am I supposed to do?<br /> {{qf|Homer}} You don't know how long I've been waiting for this. Finally, I can pass down to my kids my vast knowledge about what I'm truly amazing at: being canned.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Homer}} Oh, being fired is basically my job these days. In fact, I was fired yesterday because of all the time I took looking for ingredients with you.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Marge}} Hi, Lisa. I see you're still on the couch. How you doing?<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} I'd be doing a lot better if you moved that body I &quot;ruined in childbirth.&quot;<br /> {{qf|[[Bart]]}} I ruined it first.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Bernice Hibbert]]}} And we successfully sued [[Pabst Blue Ribbon]] for using our trademark symbol. From now on, they'll be known as Pabst Teal Fabric Bow.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Marge}} Gil? What are you doing here? I thought our blue bag turned your life around.<br /> {{qf|Gil}} Ah, well, it did, for a bit, but then they demolished the low-income housing I was living in to build that. Now ol' Gil is homeless.<br /> {{qf|Marge}} You mean unhoused?<br /> {{qf|Gil}} I'm living in a tent on a sidewalk and people yell at me for it every day. I can call it whatever I want.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Mr. Burns]]}} Enough of this do-goodery. Open your eyes, rich people. We're not here to help the less fortunate, we're here to bask in our fortunateness. If we really wanted to make a difference, we'd do the one thing we've spent our lives avoiding, paying our taxes. Then one organization, &quot;the government,&quot; could tackle all of society's ills, instead of leaving it to 1.5 million separate ego-driven micro-bureaucracies called &quot;charities,&quot; including... get a load of this scam... religions. But no one here wants the rational way. We all want the United Way because that's the American way. Now, I paid $10,000 for this table. I'm taking it with me.<br /> <br /> {{Season 34|Q}}</div>

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