The Wettest Stories Ever Told/Quotes - Revision history

Solar Dragon at 20:36, December 13, 2021

2021-12-13T20:36:11Z

SolarBot: replaced: Seymour Skinner → Principal Skinner, i → I

2021-05-20T12:54:19Z

replaced: Seymour Skinner → Principal Skinner, i → I

SolarBot: typos fixed: fourty → forty, hillarious → hilarious, drunkeness → drunkenness, inportant → important

2020-03-09T21:55:50Z

typos fixed: fourty → forty, hillarious → hilarious, drunkeness → drunkenness, inportant → important

2F13: linking, formatting

2019-12-01T17:12:51Z

linking, formatting

Abbot: Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, applying template Qf, rearranging links (code: quotes)

2019-12-01T17:06:23Z

Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, applying template Qf, rearranging links (code: quotes)

Show changes

SolarBot at 11:15, September 1, 2012

2012-09-01T11:15:25Z

Solar Dragon at 17:08, May 6, 2011

2011-05-06T17:08:08Z

Solar Dragon at 16:56, May 6, 2011

2011-05-06T16:56:07Z

Solar Dragon at 16:41, May 6, 2011

2011-05-06T16:41:56Z

Solar Dragon at 16:31, May 6, 2011

2011-05-06T16:31:36Z

@@ Line 26: / Line 26: @@
 ----
 {{qf|Homer}} What kind of booze cruise is this? Where's the hooch?
-{{qf|[[Ned Flanders|Ned Flandish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkenness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
+{{qf|[[Ned Flandish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkenness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
 {{qf|Marge}} I see you met our devout leader, Ned Flandish.
 {{qf|Homer}} Stupid Flandish.
@@ Line 38: / Line 38: @@
 {{qf|Homer}} D'oh!
 ----
-{{qf|[[Moe Szyslak|Moezekiel]]}} We're engaged! I didn't kill her husband just so.... I-I mean, I-I didn't kill her husband.
+{{qf|[[Moezekiel]]}} We're engaged! I didn't kill her husband just so.... I-I mean, I-I didn't kill her husband.
 {{qf|Marge}} We're not engaged. Uh, it's really more of an amiable concordance.
 {{qf|Flandish}} Oh! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Such language from a woman. Oh no! I just thought of you as a woman! ''[begins flogging himself again]''.
@@ Line 70: / Line 70: @@
 {{qf|Marge}} What did you call me?
 ----
-{{qf|Flandish}} Great [[Chief Wiggum|Chief Wig-gum]], we could never have survived our first year in the new World without you. I almost regret what we Europeans are about to do to ya.
+{{qf|Flandish}} Great Chief Wig-Gum, we could never have survived our first year in the new World without you. I almost regret what we Europeans are about to do to ya.
-{{qf|Chief Wig-gum}} What are you gonna do?
+{{qf|[[Great Chief Wig-Gum]]}} What are you gonna do?
 {{qf|Flandish}} Give you the biggest slice of pumpkin pie! ''[under his breath]'' Also, we're gonna take your land and wipe you out. ''[normal talking voice]'' Who wants whipped topping?
@@ Line 83: / Line 83: @@
 {{qf|Marge}} Ooh, like the paper towels. Go on...
 ----
-{{qf|[[Seymour Skinner|Bligh]]}} First of all, in an effort to save water, you will no longer be given any water. And because of a drawing of myself having a romantic congress with a merman... ''[the crew laughs]''... I am dumping all your mail out to sea. And I can assure you, there were cookies in there. Good cookies. The kind only a loving mother or Milhouse's father could make.
+{{qf|[[William Bligh|Bligh]]}} First of all, in an effort to save water, you will no longer be given any water. And because of a drawing of myself having a romantic congress with a merman... ''[the crew laughs]''... I am dumping all your mail out to sea. And I can assure you, there were cookies in there. Good cookies. The kind only a loving mother or Milhouse's father could make.
 {{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} My father's alive?
 {{qf|Bligh}} No, he died while baking. It's all in the letter. ''[he throws Milhouse's letter out the window]''.
@@ Line 92: / Line 92: @@
 {{qf|Bligh}} Besides that.
 ----
-{{qf|King Homer}} Welcome to our tropical paradise. Enjoy our lugas, our lagoons, and our ladies. And remember, what happens in Tahiti stays in Tahiti.
+{{qf|{{ap|King Homer|The Wettest Stories Ever Told}}}} Welcome to our tropical paradise. Enjoy our lugas, our lagoons, and our ladies. And remember, what happens in Tahiti stays in Tahiti.
-{{qf|Queen Marge}} Because we have no way of communicating with the outside world, tell me, has Robert Fulton invented the steam boat yet?
+{{qf|[[Queen Marge]]}} Because we have no way of communicating with the outside world, tell me, has Robert Fulton invented the steam boat yet?
 {{qf|[[Jimbo]]}} Any day now.
 {{qf|Queen Marge}} Ooooh.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Bart Simpson|Fletcher Christian]]}} Captain, this is a mutiny.
+{{qf|[[Fletcher Christian]]}} Captain, this is a mutiny.
 {{qf|Bligh}} ''[uncomfortable laugh]'' Well, let's not be hasty, there, uh, what if I introduce a suggestion box?
 {{qf|[[Dolph]]}} We have a suggestion box. You made it from the head of the last guy who had a suggestion.

@@ Line 40: / Line 40: @@
 {{qf|[[Moe Szyslak|Moezekiel]]}} We're engaged! I didn't kill her husband just so.... I-I mean, I-I didn't kill her husband.
 {{qf|Marge}} We're not engaged. Uh, it's really more of an amiable concordance.
-{{qf|Flandish}} Oh! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Such language from a woman. Oh no! i just thought of you as a woman! ''[begins flogging himself again]''.
+{{qf|Flandish}} Oh! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Such language from a woman. Oh no! I just thought of you as a woman! ''[begins flogging himself again]''.
 ----
 {{qf|[[Reverend Lovejoy]]}} Lord, we thank you for the many ways you show your love: the sun which bakes our lips to the point of bleeding and your hilarious idea to surround us with water that would kill us if we drank it.

@@ Line 5: / Line 5: @@
 {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Red Lobster?
 {{qf|Captain McCallister}} Not that good ''[the family moan in dissapointment]''. Until then, perhaps an old sea yarn may pass the time. Too bad I don't know any.
-{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} I know one, about the most inportant sea voyage in American history. The journey of "[[Mayflower]]".
+{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} I know one, about the most important sea voyage in American history. The journey of "[[Mayflower]]".
 {{qf|Captain McCallister}} Ah, yes. The ship that brought prostitutes to America.
 {{qf|Lisa}} Not prostitutes, Protestants.
@@ Line 26: / Line 26: @@
 ----
 {{qf|Homer}} What kind of booze cruise is this? Where's the hooch?
-{{qf|[[Ned Flanders|Ned Flandish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkeness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
+{{qf|[[Ned Flanders|Ned Flandish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkenness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
 {{qf|Marge}} I see you met our devout leader, Ned Flandish.
 {{qf|Homer}} Stupid Flandish.
@@ Line 42: / Line 42: @@
 {{qf|Flandish}} Oh! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Such language from a woman. Oh no! i just thought of you as a woman! ''[begins flogging himself again]''.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Reverend Lovejoy]]}} Lord, we thank you for the many ways you show your love: the sun which bakes our lips to the point of bleeding and your hillarious idea to surround us with water that would kill us if we drank it.
+{{qf|[[Reverend Lovejoy]]}} Lord, we thank you for the many ways you show your love: the sun which bakes our lips to the point of bleeding and your hilarious idea to surround us with water that would kill us if we drank it.
 ----
 {{qf|Moezekiel}} Oh my God, look at that hand-on-hand action! If I don't do somethin', soon they'll be exchanging pleasantries.
@@ Line 59: / Line 59: @@
 {{qf|Bart}} Oh, when we landed, I was going to denounce my sister as a witch.
 {{qf|Lisa}} I keep telling you, the ability to add two-digit numbers is not witchcraft!
-{{qf|Bart}} Thirty-one plus fourty-three.
+{{qf|Bart}} Thirty-one plus forty-three.
 {{qf|Lisa}} Seventy-four.
 {{qf|Pilgrims}} ''[pointing at Lisa]'' Witch! Witch! Witch!

@@ Line 26: / Line 26: @@
 ----
 {{qf|Homer}} What kind of booze cruise is this? Where's the hooch?
-{{qf|[[Ned Flanders|Ned Fladish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkeness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
+{{qf|[[Ned Flanders|Ned Flandish]]}} Heh, heh, heh, we Puritans have no place for drunkeness... or colorful clothes, or dreaming, or poetry. So, if you write a sonnet, keep it under your bonnet. ''[panicked]'' Oh no! That was a poem! ''[he pulls out a cat-o'-nine-tails and flogs himself with it]'' Forgive me, Lord! ''[he pours salt on his back]'' Then, pour a little salt in the wounds... and I'm good.
 {{qf|Marge}} I see you met our devout leader, Ned Flandish.
 {{qf|Homer}} Stupid Flandish.
@@ Line 83: / Line 83: @@
 {{qf|Marge}} Ooh, like the paper towels. Go on...
 ----
-{{qf|[[Seymour Skinner|Bligh]]}} First of all, in an effort to save water, you will no longer be given any water. And because of a drawing of myself having a romantic congress with a merman... ''[the crew laughs]''... I am dumping all your mail out to sea. And I can assure you, there were cookies in there. Good cookies. The kind only a loving mother or [[Milhouse]]'s father could make.
+{{qf|[[Seymour Skinner|Bligh]]}} First of all, in an effort to save water, you will no longer be given any water. And because of a drawing of myself having a romantic congress with a merman... ''[the crew laughs]''... I am dumping all your mail out to sea. And I can assure you, there were cookies in there. Good cookies. The kind only a loving mother or Milhouse's father could make.
-{{qf|Milhouse}} My father's alive?
+{{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} My father's alive?
 {{qf|Bligh}} No, he died while baking. It's all in the letter. ''[he throws Milhouse's letter out the window]''.
 ----

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-{{TabQ
+{{TabQ}}
 {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Kiss Kiss Bang Bangalore|Girls Just Want to Have Sums}}
@@ Line 11: / Line 9: @@
 :'''Lisa:''' Not prostitutes, Protestants.
 :'''Captain McCallister:''' Now who's being naiive?
-----
 == Mayflower Madman ==
 :'''[[Homer]]:''' I'm so bored, I figured out where the wallpaper pattern repeats. See, it goes: ship's wheel, Popeye tattoo, Gilligan hat, fish with boobs, and back to ship's wheel.
@@ Line 75: / Line 73: @@
 :'''Chief Wig-gum:''' What are you gonna do?
 :'''Flandish:''' Give you the biggest slice of pumpkin pie! ''(under his breath)'' Also, we're gonna take your land and wipe you out. ''(normal talking voice)'' Who wants whipped topping?
 == Stupidity on the Bounty ==
@@ Line 110: / Line 107: @@
 :'''Christian:''' Oh boy, do I suck.
 :'''Jimbo:''' Yeah.
 == The Neptune Upending ==
@@ Line 138: / Line 134: @@
 :'''Christian:''' Right, you keep believing that.
-{{Season 17 Q}}
+{{Season 17|Q}}
 {{DEFAULTSORT:Wettest Stories Ever Told/Quotes}}

@@ Line 7: / Line 7: @@
 :'''[[Marge]]:''' Red Lobster?
 :'''Captain McCallister:''' Not that good ''(the family moan in dissapointment)''. Until then, perhaps an old sea yarn may pass the time. Too bad I don't know any.
-:'''[[Lisa]]:''' I know one, about the most inportant sea voyage in American history. The journey of "Mayflower".
+:'''[[Lisa]]:''' I know one, about the most inportant sea voyage in American history. The journey of "[[Mayflower]]".
 :'''Captain McCallister:''' Ah, yes. The ship that brought prostitutes to America.
 :'''Lisa:''' Not prostitutes, Protestants.
@@ Line 75: / Line 75: @@
 :'''Chief Wig-gum:''' What are you gonna do?
 :'''Flandish:''' Give you the biggest slice of pumpkin pie! ''(under his breath)'' Also, we're gonna take your land and wipe you out. ''(normal talking voice)'' Who wants whipped topping?
 {{Season 17 Q}}
 {{DEFAULTSORT:Wettest Stories Ever Told/Quotes}}

@@ Line 50: / Line 50: @@
 :'''Moezekiel:''' Man, that guy sends my humors from sanguine to bilious. ''(he addresses the camera)'' That's how we talk, weird, huh? ''(returning to character)'' Time to think of a plan most sneaky.
 ----
+:'''Moezekiel:''' Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I'm throwing a little party tonight to celebrate that only half of us have died so far.
 {{Season 17 Q}}
 {{DEFAULTSORT:Wettest Stories Ever Told/Quotes}}