Simpsons Christmas Stories/Quotes - Revision history

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Solar Dragon at 13:03, November 28, 2020

2020-11-28T13:03:21Z

Solar Dragon at 12:53, November 28, 2020

2020-11-28T12:53:12Z

Solar Dragon at 12:51, November 28, 2020

2020-11-28T12:51:47Z

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AleWi: Created page with "{{tabQ}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}} :'''Virgin Mary''': Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man. :'''Saint Joseph''': Tell me..."

2014-05-07T18:34:43Z

Created page with "{{tabQ}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}} :'''Virgin Mary''': Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man. :'''Saint Joseph''': Tell me..."

New page

{{tabQ}}
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}}

:'''[[Virgin Mary]]''': Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man.
:'''[[Saint Joseph]]''': Tell me about it.
:'''[[Virgin Mary]]''': And yet, I am with child.
:'''[[Saint Joseph]]''': A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.
----
:'''[[Marge]]''': I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
:'''[[Homer]]''': It's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.
----
:'''[[Bart]]''': Grampa?!
:'''[[Lisa]]''': What are you doing in the chimney?
:'''[[Grampa]]''': Trying to kill Santa. What's it to ya?!
:'''[[Bart]]''': What do you have against Santa?
:'''[[Grampa]]''': He screwed me over back in WWII! I was a navy pilot in the Pacific.
:'''[[Lisa]]''':Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question?
:'''[[Bart]]''': It just slipped out!
----
:'''[[Grampa]]''': Cyrus, I miss you every day.
:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': He misses you, too.
:'''[[Grampa]]''': Wait! He, what, who?!
:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
:'''[[Grampa]]''': Will we be back for the tournament of roses parade?
:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Probably not.
:'''[[Grampa]]''': Good, I hate that crap.
:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Yeah, me, too.
----
:'''[[Marge]]''': Where's Reverend Lovejoy? He's never been late for christmas service.
:'''[[Homer]]''': Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.

{{Season 17|Q}}

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:16, February 26, 2022
Line 1:		Line 1:
−	{{~~tabQ~~}}	+	{{TabQ}}
	{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|The Italian Bob\|Homer's Paternity Coot}}		{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|The Italian Bob\|Homer's Paternity Coot}}

@@ Line 28: / Line 28: @@
 {{qf|[[Carl Carlson|Shepherd Carl]]}} I knew I'd like him. But I never dreamed I'd adore him.
 {{qf|[[Lenny Leonard|Shepherd Lenny]]}} I've got the Messiah's nose! I've got the Messiah's nose!
-{{qf|Shepherd Carl}} Give it back, give it back -- he'll kill us all!
+{{qf|Shepherd Carl}} Give it back, give it back—he'll kill us all!
 ----
 {{qf|Joseph}} My wine turned into water! Who could've performed such a cruel miracle?

@@ Line 87: / Line 87: @@
 {{qf|Moe}} Maybe next year. Huh?
 ----
-{{qf|[[Marge]]}} I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
+{{qf|Marge}} I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
 {{qf|Homer}} Oh, it's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.
 {{Season 17|Q}}

@@ Line 44: / Line 44: @@
 {{qf|Homer}} I know, it's weird, isn't it?
 ----
-{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Grampa?! What are you doing in the chimney?
+{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Grampa?!
 {{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Trying to kill Santa. What's it to ya?
-{{qf|[[Bart]]}} What do you have against Santa?
+{{qf|Bart}} What do you have against Santa?
 {{qf|Grampa}} He screwed me over back in Double-ya Double-ya two. I was a Navy pilot in the Pacific...
 {{qf|Lisa}} ''[loud whisper]'' Oh, Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question?

@@ Line 2: / Line 2: @@
 {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}}
-{{qf|[[Virgin Mary]]}} Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man.
+{{qf|[[Marge]]}} Where's [[Reverend Lovejoy]]? He's never been late for [[Christmas]] service.
 {{qf|[[Saint Joseph]]}} Tell me about it.
-{{qf|Virgin Mary}} And yet, I am with child.
+{{qf|Mary}} And yet... I am with child.
-{{qf|Saint Joseph}} A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.
+{{qf|Joseph}} A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Marge]]}} I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
+{{qf|Joseph}} My wine turned into water! Who could've performed such a cruel miracle?
-{{qf|[[Homer]]}} It's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.
+{{qf|[[Jesus Christ|Baby Jesus]]}} Heh, heh, heh, heh.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Grampa?!
+{{qf|Young Burns}} This sleigh is my ticket off this hell hole! And I'm keeping all the toys for myself. Because at heart I'm just a very wicked child.
-{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} What are you doing in the chimney?
+{{qf|Young Grampa}} You backstabber! And I let you spoon me.
 ----
-{{qf|Grampa}} Cyrus, I miss you every day.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti and he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
-{{qf|[[Santa Claus]]}} He misses you, too.
+{{qf|Grampa}} Will we be back for the Tournament of Roses Parade?
 {{qf|Santa Claus}} Probably not.
-{{qf|Grampa}} Good, I hate that crap.
+{{qf|Grampa}} Good. I hate that crap.
-{{qf|Santa Claus}} Yeah, me, too.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Yeah, me too.
 ----
-{{qf|Marge}} Where's [[Reverend Lovejoy]]? He's never been late for Christmas service.
+{{qf|Grampa}} Santa, one thing's still buggin' me. Why didn't you ever come back to pick me up?
-{{qf|Homer}} Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} I kept putting it off, and then I was just too embarrassed.
 {{Season 17|Q}}

@@ Line 21: / Line 21: @@
 {{qf|[[Santa Claus]]}} He misses you, too.
 {{qf|Grampa}} Wait! He, what, who?!
-{{qf|Santa Claus}} Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into [[Tahiti]]. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
 {{qf|Grampa}} Will we be back for the tournament of roses parade?
 {{qf|Santa Claus}} Probably not.
@@ Line 27: / Line 27: @@
 {{qf|Santa Claus}} Yeah, me, too.
 ----
-{{qf|Marge}} Where's Reverend Lovejoy? He's never been late for christmas service.
+{{qf|Marge}} Where's [[Reverend Lovejoy]]? He's never been late for christmas service.
 {{qf|Homer}} Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.
 {{Season 17|Q}}

@@ Line 2: / Line 2: @@
 {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Italian Bob|Homer's Paternity Coot}}
-:'''[[Virgin Mary]]''': Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man.
+{{qf|[[Virgin Mary]]}} Joseph, you know I have never lain with a man.
-:'''[[Saint Joseph]]''': Tell me about it.
+{{qf|[[Saint Joseph]]}} Tell me about it.
-:'''[[Virgin Mary]]''': And yet, I am with child.
+{{qf|Virgin Mary}} And yet, I am with child.
-:'''[[Saint Joseph]]''': A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.
+{{qf|Saint Joseph}} A pregnant virgin?! That's every man's worst nightmare.
 ----
-:'''[[Marge]]''': I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
+{{qf|[[Marge]]}} I knew you'd forget, so my gift to you is a gift for you to give me.
-:'''[[Homer]]''': It's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.
+{{qf|[[Homer]]}} It's just what I wanted. Here, Marge, this is for you.
 ----
-:'''[[Bart]]''': Grampa?!
+{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Grampa?!
-:'''[[Lisa]]''': What are you doing in the chimney?
+{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} What are you doing in the chimney?
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': Trying to kill Santa. What's it to ya?!
+{{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Trying to kill Santa. What's it to ya?!
-:'''[[Bart]]''': What do you have against Santa?
+{{qf|Bart}} What do you have against Santa?
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': He screwed me over back in WWII! I was a navy pilot in the Pacific.
+{{qf|Grampa}} He screwed me over back in WWII! I was a navy pilot in the Pacific.
-:'''[[Lisa]]''':Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question?
+{{qf|Lisa}}Bart, why'd you ask him a follow-up question?
-:'''[[Bart]]''': It just slipped out!
+{{qf|Bart}} It just slipped out!
 ----
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': Cyrus, I miss you every day.
+{{qf|Grampa}} Cyrus, I miss you every day.
-:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': He misses you, too.
+{{qf|[[Santa Claus]]}} He misses you, too.
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': Wait! He, what, who?!
+{{qf|Grampa}} Wait! He, what, who?!
-:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Your brother didn't die in the war, Abe. He crashed into Tahiti. And he liked it so much, he never left. And now, if you like, I'll take you to him.
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': Will we be back for the tournament of roses parade?
+{{qf|Grampa}} Will we be back for the tournament of roses parade?
-:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Probably not.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Probably not.
-:'''[[Grampa]]''': Good, I hate that crap.
+{{qf|Grampa}} Good, I hate that crap.
-:'''[[Santa Claus]]''': Yeah, me, too.
+{{qf|Santa Claus}} Yeah, me, too.
 ----
-:'''[[Marge]]''': Where's Reverend Lovejoy? He's never been late for christmas service.
+{{qf|Marge}} Where's Reverend Lovejoy? He's never been late for christmas service.
-:'''[[Homer]]''': Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.
+{{qf|Homer}} Maybe he's cheating on us with the episcopalians. Look at 'em, with their bright, airy narthex and light, flaky eucharist. I wouldn't mind dipping my hand in their font.
 {{Season 17|Q}}