https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=Owl_or_Nothing%2FQuotes 2026-04-08T14:35:21Z Revision history for this page on the wiki MediaWiki 1.29.0 https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?title=Owl_or_Nothing/Quotes&diff=1217232&oldid=prev 2023-08-19T14:15:50Z

<p>Created page with &quot;{{TabQ|nogags}} {{qf|<a href="/wiki/Bart" class="mw-redirect" title="Bart">Bart</a>}} I&#039;d like to start off this school assembly by giving Principal Skinner the bird! {{qf|Bird Sanctuary employee}} Because of the money your scho...&quot;</p> <p><b>New page</b></p><div>{{TabQ|nogags}}<br /> <br /> {{qf|[[Bart]]}} I'd like to start off this school assembly by giving Principal Skinner the bird!<br /> {{qf|Bird Sanctuary employee}} Because of the money your school has raised for the [[Springfield Bird Sanctuary]], we've named a bird in honor of you...<br /> {{qf|Bart}} Behold, [[The Flaming Blue Wiener]]!<br /> {{qf|[[Principal Skinner]]}} I thought Lisa was going to name the bird The Skinner Sparrow.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Homer]]}} What does the company's health plan cover again?<br /> {{qf|[[Waylon Smithers]]}} It's the standard American health plan. Your boss yells at you until you're better.<br /> {{qf|[[Mr. Burns]]}} Get back to work, you lackadaisical loafer!<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} You made a nest out of my homework!<br /> {{qf|Bart}} Wow! I'll get mine, too! This is a way better excuse than &quot;my dog ate it!&quot;<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Marge]]}} You know, Homer, it'd be nice if you'd talk to me about your day sometime instead of the dog.<br /> {{qf|Homer}} You're right, Marge. Who's a good wife? Who is? You are! Yes, you are!<br /> {{qf|Marge}} [SIGH!] Sometimes you take what you can get.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Homer}} You wanted to see me, Mr. Burns?<br /> {{qf|Mr. Burns}} Indeed, I did! I want to put you in a new home!<br /> {{qf|Homer}} And you want my soul for that?<br /> {{qf|Mr. Burns}} Oh my, no! The soul market dried up in the eighties!<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Homer}} I don't get it. Why don't you just take my soul?<br /> {{qf|Mr. Burns}} For the last time, no! I'm still trying to sell [[Howie Mandel]]'s.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Veterinarian]]}} The good news is the wing is healing nicely.<br /> {{qf|Lisa}} And the bad news?<br /> {{qf|Veterinarian}} This owl is a jerk! That's probably why he's been injured so much in the past. He probably had it coming!<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Hans Moleman]]}} all I'm saying is my dog's missing!<br /> {{qf|Homer}} And the first thing you do is blame the neighbor with a moat filled with crocodiles? Typical!<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Homer}} Okay, Mr. Burns, what now? Mr. Burns?<br /> {{qf|Smithers}} He can't hear you. He's in a coma. It happens when his plans go too well. He's overloaded the evil joy portion of his brain. He's paralyzed by his own success.<br /> <br /> [[Category:Simpsons Comics stories quotes]]</div>

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