https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=Meat_Is_Murder%2FQuotes 2026-04-07T05:30:55Z Revision history for this page on the wiki MediaWiki 1.29.0 https://simpsonswiki.com/w/index.php?title=Meat_Is_Murder/Quotes&diff=1160021&oldid=prev 2022-05-17T13:27:40Z

<p>Created page with &quot;{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge the Meanie|Poorhouse Rock}} {{qf|<a href="/wiki/Krusty_the_Clown" title="Krusty the Clown">Krusty the Clown</a>}} You&#039;re the most modest businessmen I ever met. {{qf|<a href="/wiki/Augustus_Redfield" title="Augustus Redfield">Augustus Redfield</a>}}...&quot;</p> <p><b>New page</b></p><div>{{TabQ|nogags}}<br /> {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Marge the Meanie|Poorhouse Rock}}<br /> <br /> {{qf|[[Krusty the Clown]]}} You're the most modest businessmen I ever met.<br /> {{qf|[[Augustus Redfield]]}} ''[chuckles]'' Oh, gosh, no. I'm sure there's people much more modest than us.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} Hey, hey. It's [[Krusty Burger]]'s 50th anniversary, and I want you to celebrate with me at [[Krusty Fest]]. Meet all your favorite Krustyland characters from the good old days. [[Burger Reynolds]]. [[Grilly Cheese King]]. [[Jack Pickleson]]. [[Patty Meltin' John]].<br /> {{qf|[[Homer]]}} ''[gasps]'' Patty Meltin' John. I remember when he sang at Princess Fries' funeral.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Space Clown}} Only one thing can save me now: every kid out there needs to buy a Mega-sized Krusty meal. Full price. Money is my oxygen.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Lisa, I got you one with a patty that's 100% veggie.<br /> {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Yeah, the burgers never had actual meat, but somehow the sodas do.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Gus}} I'm Augustus Redfield, chairman of the [[RedStar]] Corporation.<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} Yeah, yeah, hey, hey. {{ap|Sarah|Meat Is Murder}}, get this yutz a headshot and sign it from me &quot;with warm regards.&quot;<br /> {{qf|Gus}} I'm here to destroy you for what you did to me.<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} Change that to &quot;regular regards.&quot; Who the hell do you think you are?! ''[yelps]'' Hey, it's you. [[Worth-A-Try Burger]], right? You doing good?<br /> {{qf|Gus}} I'm the ninth richest man in the world now.<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} ''[groans]'' Okay, warmest regards.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Grampa]]}} Old partner? ''[gasps]'' That's me.<br /> {{qf|Homer}} No, it's not, Dad. Nothing is you.<br /> {{qf|Gus}} Abe Simpson, it is you. It is. Oh... My old friend, I am about to change your life.<br /> {{qf|Homer}} Dad, it's not you!<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Gus}} Abe, now that I've got our burger business back, I need you by my side. I want you to sit on my board of directors.<br /> {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Grampa, you love sitting.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Homer}} Wow, Dad, now you can be a Republican because you're rich and greedy, and not because you're old and don't know how to change the channel.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Colby Redfield]]}} Dad, I'm gonna start a religion where you're the Jesus. Think of the tax implications. Please, please, think of them.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Mav Redfield]]}} Dad, as we speak, there are 10,000 influencers at my island music festival.<br /> {{qf|[[Sheila Redfield]]}} Too bad the bands haven't shown up, and there's no food, toilets, or ways off the island.<br /> {{qf|Mav}} ''[scoffs]'' No biggie, nobody died. ''[looks at phone]'' Well, nobody famous died. Okay, I hope none of you like {{W|Kenny Chesney}}.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Sideshow Mel|Nothing Mel]]}} It's the ''[[Herschel the Comical Man Show!]]'' I'm your announcer, Nothing Mel. And here's a performer who's not violating any termination agreement implied or in writing. Him.<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} Hee-hoo, kids. Say hi to Mr. Teeny-Dog, who's not affiliated with Krusty Enterprises, its designees, or assigns.<br /> {{qf|[[Nelson Muntz]]}} Haw-haw! You don't control your own I.P.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Grampa}} Lisa, I'm so glad you made me come here. Who knew having a purpose in life would give my life purpose?<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Angela Merkel]]}} What do you do?<br /> {{qf|{{Ch|Charli D'Amelio}}}} Well, I entertain people on their phones while they watch TV. How about you?<br /> {{qf|Angela Merkel}} I am often the only voice of reason in all of Europe.<br /> {{qf|Charli D'Amelio}} Cool. How do you monetize that?<br /> {{qf|Angela Merkel}} I don't.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|[[Greg Hirsch]]}} All right, so, uh, I mostly just get sandwiches for the security guards, but it's more complicated than it sounds. There's, like, five kinds of bread now.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Gus}} ''[to Sheila]'' You led this coup against me. You're out. You get nothing! ''[to Jessica]'' Tell {{W|Megan Ellison}} she's my daughter now.<br /> {{qf|{{ap|Jessica|Meat Is Murder}}}} She'll be there at your birthday dinner tomorrow night.<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Grampa}} Hold your horseradish! When I voted &quot;no,&quot; I was talking about the Japanese Noh theater, which I saw plenty of when I was stationed in the Pacific, stranded on a raft made of Dear John letters and mermaid hair. I married one of those mermaids, but she was a reverso, fish head and lady gams. ''[laughs]'' That, plus a thousand other things, made me what I am today... mentally incompetent. ''[babbles]''<br /> ----<br /> {{qf|Krusty}} I can be a clown again. ''[laughs goofily]''<br /> {{qf|[[Nehorai]]}} He was a clown? He was, like, the least funny person on this socialist commune.<br /> <br /> {{Season 33|Q}}</div>

Solar Dragon