Homer Badman/Quotes - Revision history

SolarBot: /* top */ replaced: Squeaky-voiced teen → Squeaky-Voiced Teen

2025-05-12T23:43:19Z

‎top: replaced: Squeaky-voiced teen → Squeaky-Voiced Teen

SolarBot: /* top */replaced: … → ... (2), ... → ..., →, typos fixed: he he → he

2020-02-22T22:18:36Z

‎top: replaced: … → ... (2), ... → ..., →, typos fixed: he he → he

2F13: formatting

2018-11-26T13:20:27Z

formatting

Abbot: Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, applying template Qf (code: quotes)

2018-11-26T13:18:23Z

Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, applying template Qf (code: quotes)

Show changes

2F13: linking, formatting

2018-11-26T13:18:10Z

linking, formatting

SolarBot: /* top */General fixes, removed: |gags=yes

2017-04-16T15:24:55Z

‎top: General fixes, removed: |gags=yes

SolarBot: replaced: _ → (2)

2012-09-08T12:59:15Z

replaced: _ → (2)

SolarBot: replaced: Squeaky-Voiced Teen → Squeaky-voiced teen

2012-09-01T09:06:01Z

replaced: Squeaky-Voiced Teen → Squeaky-voiced teen

SolarBot: replaced: {{Season 6 Q}} → {{Season 6|Q}}

2012-08-27T19:36:49Z

replaced: {{Season 6 Q}} → {{Season 6|Q}}

WebkinzMania at 23:46, June 16, 2012

2012-06-16T23:46:06Z

@@ Line 42: / Line 42: @@
 {{qf|Homer}} Hey, that's a half-truth!
 ----
-{{qf|[[Squeaky-voiced teen]]}} Yes, I am interested in long distance savings. Very interested!
+{{qf|[[Squeaky-Voiced Teen]]}} Yes, I am interested in long distance savings. Very interested!
 ----
 :''[Homer flips through channels, but all of them are making jokes about him. He turns to [[Channel Ocho]]]''

@@ Line 12: / Line 12: @@
 {{qf|[[Marge]]}} Oh, well thank you, Homer, but take one of the kids.
 {{qf|Homer}} Marge, they can't carry enough candy! They have puny little muscles, not big ropy ones like you.
-{{qf|Marge}} Mmm…
+{{qf|Marge}} Mmm...
 {{qf|Bart}} You go, Mom, for the greater good.
 {{qf|Lisa}} For the greater good.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Apu]]}} ''[to Homer]'' Hey. Hey! Hey! I have asked you nicely not to mangle my merchandise. You leave me no choice but to…ask you nicely again.
+{{qf|[[Apu]]}} ''[to Homer]'' Hey. Hey! Hey! I have asked you nicely not to mangle my merchandise. You leave me no choice but to... ask you nicely again.
 ----
 {{qf|Homer}} I can't say titmouse without giggling like a schoolgirl. ''[starts giggling like a schoolgirl]'' Hee hee hee hee hee hee hee.
@@ Line 49: / Line 49: @@
 :''[Homer selects that TV show. Comedian is shown]''
 {{qf|Comedian}} OK, so let us say Mr. T and E.T. had a baby. They could call it: Mr. E.T! And it could say something like this...
-{{qf|Comedian}} ''[impersonating Mr. T]'' I pity the fool that don't... ''[impersonating E.T.]'' ...phone home!
+{{qf|Comedian}} ''[impersonating Mr. T]'' I pity the fool that don't... ''[impersonating E.T.]''...phone home!
 :''[Audience laughs, as does Homer, who is now cheered up]''
-{{qf|Homer}} ''[talking to himself]'' He he he! Boy, I sure would not want to be Mr. T right now!
+{{qf|Homer}} ''[talking to himself]'' He he! Boy, I sure would not want to be Mr. T right now!
 ----
 :''[In an edited version of his interview with Godfrey Jones, the splices can be told because the clock in the background keeps changing times.]''
@@ Line 91: / Line 91: @@
 {{qf|Lisa}} Dad, I don't understand. What is she saying you did?
 {{qf|Homer}} Well, Lisa, remember that postcard Grampa sent us from Florida of that alligator biting that woman's bottom?
-{{qf|Bart}} Oh, yeah, that was  brilliant !
+{{qf|Bart}} Oh, yeah, that was brilliant !
 {{qf|Homer}} That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But it turns out we were wrong: that alligator was sexually harassing the woman.
 {{qf|Bart}} And the dog in the Coppertone ad? Same deal, Dad?

@@ Line 46: / Line 46: @@
 :''[Homer flips through channels, but all of them are making jokes about him. He turns to [[Channel Ocho]]]''
 {{qf|[[Bumblebee Man]]}} Ay yi yi! Es Homer Simpson! Me ha molestado!
-{{qf|Homer}}{talking to himself}: Oh, I like it better when they're making fun of people who aren't me. Oh, I know! ''Evening at the Improv''! They never talk about anything past the 1980s!
+{{qf|Homer}} ''[talking to himself]'' Oh, I like it better when they're making fun of people who aren't me. Oh, I know! ''Evening at the Improv''! They never talk about anything past the 1980s!
 :''[Homer selects that TV show. Comedian is shown]''
 {{qf|Comedian}} OK, so let us say Mr. T and E.T. had a baby. They could call it: Mr. E.T! And it could say something like this...

@@ Line 49: / Line 49: @@
 :''(Homer selects that TV show. Comedian is shown)''
 :'''Comedian:''' OK, so let us say Mr. T and E.T. had a baby. They could call it: Mr. E.T! And it could say something like this...
-:'''Comedian :'''{impersonating Mr. T}: I pity the fool that don't...
+:'''Comedian:''' ''[impersonating Mr. T]'' I pity the fool that don't... ''[impersonating E.T.]'' ...phone home!
 :''(Audience laughs, as does Homer, who is now cheered up)''
-:'''Homer :'''{talking to himself}: He he he! Boy, I sure would not want to be Mr. T right now!
+:'''Homer:''' ''[talking to himself]'' He he he! Boy, I sure would not want to be Mr. T right now!
 ----
-:''(in an edited version of his interview with [[Godfrey Jones]], the splices can be told because the clock in the background keeps changing times)''
+:''(In an edited version of his interview with Godfrey Jones, the splices can be told because the clock in the background keeps changing times.)''
 :'''Homer:''' Somebody had to take the babysitter home, then I noticed she was sitting on / her / sweet can... / so I grabbed / her / sweet can... / Ohhhh, just thinking about / her / can... / I just wish I had / her / sweet, sweet / s/s/sweet can...
-:'''Godfrey:''' So, Mr. Simpson, you admit you grabbed her can. What do you have to say in your defense? ''(we see a still video shot of Homer looking lustful)'' Mr. Simpson, your silence will only incriminate you further! ''(the frozen image of Homer begins to slowly zoom in)'' No, Mr. Simpson, don't take your anger out on me! Get back! Get back! M-Mr. Simpson! NOOOO!
+:'''[[Godfrey Jones|Godfrey]]:''' So, Mr. Simpson, you admit you grabbed her can. What do you have to say in your defense? ''(we see a still video shot of Homer looking lustful)'' Mr. Simpson, your silence will only incriminate you further! ''(the frozen image of Homer begins to slowly zoom in)'' No, Mr. Simpson, don't take your anger out on me! Get back! Get back! M-Mr. Simpson! NOOOO!
 :''(freeze frames on the screaming Godfrey)''
 :'''Announcer:''' Dramatization may not have happened.
 ----
 :'''Marge:''' There are only 49 stars on that flag.
-:'''Grampa:''' I'll be deep in the cold cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!
+:'''[[Grampa]]:''' I'll be deep in the cold cold ground before I recognize Missour-ah!
 ----
 :'''Bart:''' Why would anyone want to touch a girl's butt? That's where cooties come from!
@@ Line 86: / Line 85: @@
 ----
 :'''Homer:''' Hey kids! Lots of candy left for breakfast.
-:''(Bart and Lisa groan)''
+:''(Bart and Lisa groan.)''
 :'''Marge:''' Why don't we give it to some needy children then?
-:''(Bart and Lisa groan again, lie on candy, eat it slowly)''
+:''(Bart and Lisa groan again, lie on candy, eat it slowly.)''
 ----
 :'''Lisa:''' Dad, I don't understand. What is she saying you did?
@@ Line 98: / Line 97: @@
 ----
 :'''Marge:''' Look, maybe this whole thing will blow over.
-:''(helicopters swoop over the house; news vans pull up)''
+:''(Helicopters swoop over the house; news vans pull up.)''
 :'''Homer:''' It didn't blow over, Marge. Nothing ever blows over for me.
 ----
 :'''Announcer:''' Today on "Ben": mothers and runaway daughters reunited by their hatred of Homer Simpson. And here's your host, Gentle Ben.
-:''(a bear wearing a helmet with a microphone runs out)''
+:''(A bear wearing a helmet with a microphone runs out.)''
 :'''Woman 1:''' I just have one thing to say: let's have less Homer Simpson and more money for public schools.
-:''(audience applauses; Ben growls)''
+:''(Audience applauses; Ben growls.)''
 :'''Woman 2:''' Ben, I have a question --
-:''(Ben runs over to the tables filled with food)''
+:''(Ben runs over to the tables filled with food.)''
 :'''Man:''' No, Ben, no!
-:''(Ben swats him away; men shoot tranquilizers into him)''
+:''(Ben swats him away; men shoot tranquilizers into him.)''
 ----
 :'''Lisa:''' Sorry, Dad, we do believe in you, we really do.
 :'''Bart:''' It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than you have.
 :'''Homer:''' Oh, maybe TV is right. TV's always right! ''(walks upstairs)''
-:''(Bart and Lisa hug the TV)''
+:''(Bart and Lisa hug the TV.)''
 :'''Homer:''' ''(from upstairs)'' Are you hugging the TV?!
 :'''Bart & Lisa:''' No... ''(they kiss it)''
@@ Line 120: / Line 119: @@
 :'''Lisa:''' The media's making a monster out of you because they don't care about the truth! All they care about is entertainment. Well, you need a forum where they don't even know the meaning of the word "entertainment": public access television.
 :'''Homer:''' Aw, but those shows all look so crummy.
-:'''Marge:''' Well we could dress it up a bit...we can bring a fern, and a folding chair from the garage, and the most decorative thing of all: the truth!
+:'''Marge:''' Well we could dress it up a bit... we can bring a fern, and a folding chair from the garage, and the most decorative thing of all: the truth!
 ----
 :'''Lisa:''' And now it's time for the Innocence Report with Homer Simpson. ''(holds sign: "Innocence Report")''
-:'''Homer:''' Hello. I am Homer Simpson, or as some of you wags have dubbed me, Father Goose. You know, everybody believed the worst about me right away; nobody cares that I didn't do it. But I didn't! OK, look: I've done some bad things in my life, but harassing women is not one of them. ''(softly)'' Like one time, we were having this race with the stupid old tiny bicycle with the big wheel in front, so I figure, "We'll see about that!" So I get this big chunk of cinderblock, and...
+:'''Homer:''' Hello. I am Homer Simpson, or as some of you wags have dubbed me, Father Goose. You know, everybody believed the worst about me right away; nobody cares that I didn't do it. But I didn't! OK, look: I've done some bad things in my life, but harassing women is not one of them. ''(softly)'' Like one time, we were having this race with the stupid old tiny bicycle with the big wheel in front, so I figure, "We'll see about that!" So I get this big chunk of cinderblock, and... ''[Marge makes a choking noise]'' Oh, gotta go. ''(walks off; pops head back on)'' Innocent!
 ----
 :'''Homer:''' ''(stirring a bowl)'' Aw, Marge, this is so depressing, my only hope is this homemade Prozac. ''(tastes it)'' Mmm, needs more ice cream.

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:24, April 16, 2017
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−	{{TabQ~~\|gags=yes~~}}	+	{{TabQ}}
	{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|Lisa on Ice\|Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy}}		{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|Lisa on Ice\|Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy}}

@@ Line 92: / Line 92: @@
 :'''Lisa:''' Dad, I don't understand. What is she saying you did?
 :'''Homer:''' Well, Lisa, remember that postcard Grampa sent us from Florida of that alligator biting that woman's bottom?
-:'''Bart:''' Oh, yeah, that was _brilliant_!
+:'''Bart:''' Oh, yeah, that was  brilliant !
 :'''Homer:''' That's right, we all thought it was hilarious. But it turns out we were wrong: that alligator was sexually harassing the woman.
 :'''Bart:''' And the dog in the Coppertone ad? Same deal, Dad?

@@ Line 42: / Line 42: @@
 :'''Homer:''' Hey, that's a half-truth!
 ----
-:'''[[Squeaky-Voiced Teen]]:''' Yes, I am interested in long distance savings. Very interested!
+:'''[[Squeaky-voiced teen]]:''' Yes, I am interested in long distance savings. Very interested!
 ----
 :''(Homer flips through channels, but all of them are making jokes about him. He turns to [[Channel Ocho]])''

← Older revision		Revision as of 19:36, August 27, 2012
Line 135:		Line 135:
	:'''Homer:''' You're both right.		:'''Homer:''' You're both right.

−	{{Season 6 Q}}	+	{{Season 6\|Q}}

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:46, June 16, 2012
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−	{{TabQ	+	{{TabQ\|gags=yes}}
−	\|~~episode~~=~~Homer Badman~~
−	}}
	{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|Lisa on Ice\|Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy}}		{{EpisodePrevNextQuo\|Lisa on Ice\|Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy}}