Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy/Quotes - Revision history

Simpsons88 at 00:44, September 21, 2020

2020-09-21T00:44:29Z

SolarBot: /* top */replaced: Kirk van Houten → Kirk Van Houten

2020-04-30T16:28:31Z

‎top: replaced: Kirk van Houten → Kirk Van Houten

SolarBot: /* top */replaced: ... → ... (2), → (2)

2020-02-22T22:15:59Z

‎top: replaced: ... → ... (2), → (2)

2F13: formatting

2018-12-01T13:24:20Z

formatting

Abbot: Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, formatting, applying template Qf, deleting empty lines, rearranging links (code: quotes)

2018-12-01T13:21:21Z

Bot: changing parenthesis to bracket, formatting, applying template Qf, deleting empty lines, rearranging links (code: quotes)

Show changes

2F13: formatting, linking

2018-12-01T13:21:08Z

formatting, linking

Show changes

SolarBot: replaced: Rex Harrison → {{Ch|Rex Harrison}}

2015-10-06T17:45:20Z

replaced: Rex Harrison → {{Ch|Rex Harrison}}

2F13: adding links

2014-08-24T15:45:21Z

adding links

205.213.104.125 at 00:58, May 17, 2014

2014-05-17T00:58:36Z

Mythigator at 19:58, October 8, 2012

2012-10-08T19:58:18Z

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 {{TabQ}}
 {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Homer Badman|Fear of Flying}}
-{{qf|[[Bart]]}} "Mom, Dad, I saw a UFO!"
+{{qf|[[Bart]]}} Mom, Dad, I saw a UFO!
 :''[Reaches for light switch]''
-{{qf|[[Homer]] and [[Marge]]}} "Don't turn on that light! Don't turn on that light!"
+{{qf|[[Homer]] and [[Marge]]}} Don't turn on that light! Don't turn on that light!
 ----
 {{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Mom! Dad! Look, this biography of Peter Ueberroth is only 99 cents. And I found the new [[Al Gore]] book. ''[holds it up]''
@@ Line 37: / Line 36: @@
 ----
 {{qf|Marge}} Here he is: {{Ch|Rex Harrison}} and {{Ch|Paul Anka}} rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it and go into business together.
 {{qf|Homer}} You want me to spend more time with Dad? What about my New Year's resolution?
 {{qf|Marge}} You can make a lot of money...
@@ Line 67: / Line 65: @@
 :''[he and Bart start wrestling]''
 {{qf|Lisa}} Hey! Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it! Why are you guys jumping to such ridiculous conclusions? Haven't you ever heard of Occam's Razor? "The simplest explanation is probably the correct one."
 {{qf|Bart}} So what's the simplest explanation?
 {{qf|Lisa}} I don't know. Maybe they're all reverse vampires and they have to get home before dark.

@@ Line 45: / Line 45: @@
 {{qf|Grampa}} Step right up, folks, and witness the magnificent medicinal miracle of Simpson & Son's patented revitalizing toniiic. Put some ardor in your larder with our energizing, moisturizing, tantalizing, romanticizing, surprising, her-prizing, revitalizing tonic.
 ----
-{{qf|[[Kirk van Houten]]}} Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together... and I found something for Milhouse down at the mall, too: ''[hands it to him]'' A pup tent!
+{{qf|[[Kirk Van Houten]]}} Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together... and I found something for Milhouse down at the mall, too: ''[hands it to him]'' A pup tent!
 {{qf|[[Milhouse]]}} Oh, boy! Now I can sleep out in the yard.
 {{qf|Kirt van Houten}} Yeah! Every single night.

@@ Line 66: / Line 66: @@
 {{qf|Milhouse}} You fool! Can't you see it's a massive government conspiracy? Or have they gotten to you too?
 :''[he and Bart start wrestling]''
-{{qf|Lisa}} Hey! Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it! Why are you guys jumping to such ridiculous conclusions? Haven't you ever heard of Occam's  Razor? "The simplest explanation is probably the correct one."
+{{qf|Lisa}} Hey! Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it! Why are you guys jumping to such ridiculous conclusions? Haven't you ever heard of Occam's Razor? "The simplest explanation is probably the correct one."
 {{qf|Bart}} So what's the simplest explanation?
@@ Line 113: / Line 113: @@
 {{qf|Milhouse}} The Rand Corporation, in conjunction with the saucer people...
 {{qf|Bart}} Thank you.
-{{qf|Milhouse}} ...under the supervision of the reverse vampires...
+{{qf|Milhouse}}...under the supervision of the reverse vampires...
 {{qf|Lisa}} ''[sighs]''
-{{qf|Milhouse}} ...are forcing our parents to go to bed early in a fiendish plot to eliminate the meal of dinner!
+{{qf|Milhouse}}...are forcing our parents to go to bed early in a fiendish plot to eliminate the meal of dinner!
 ----
-{{qf|Grampa}} And just feast your ears on this tantalizing testimonial from my own flesh and blood, the son that puts the fun in  Simpson & Son, my son, Barney!
+{{qf|Grampa}} And just feast your ears on this tantalizing testimonial from my own flesh and blood, the son that puts the fun in Simpson & Son, my son, Barney!
 {{qf|[[Barney]]}} ''[walks out from behind a curtain]'' I used to be a fat, disgusting slob. ''[belches]''
 {{qf|Man}} That medicine seems to be giving your son a lot of gas.
@@ Line 123: / Line 123: @@
 {{qf|Barney}} Oh -- ''[collapses]''
 ----
-{{qf|Homer}} Kids, your daddy and his daddy are involved in a very ''[stares at Bart's candy bar]'' sticky, nutty, chewy, chocolatey-- Put it away, boy! -- situation.
+{{qf|Homer}} Kids, your daddy and his daddy are involved in a very ''[stares at Bart's candy bar]'' sticky, nutty, chewy, chocolatey—Put it away, boy! -- situation.
 ----
 {{qf|Bart}} No offense, Homer, but your half-assed under-parenting was a lot more fun than your half-assed over-parenting.

@@ Line 34: / Line 34: @@
 {{qf|Homer}} Kids! Here's $50, why not go to the movies, then take a cab to your aunts' house? Stay there, phone call you later. Now, now, now!
 ----
-{{qf|Homer}} Ooh, mama! This is finally, really happening. After years of disappointment with get-rich-quick schemes, I know I'm gonna get rich with this scheme...and quick!
+{{qf|Homer}} Ooh, mama! This is finally, really happening. After years of disappointment with get-rich-quick schemes, I know I'm gonna get rich with this scheme... and quick!
 ----
-{{qf|Marge}} Here he is: {{Ch|Rex Harrison}} and {{Ch|Paul Anka}} rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it
+{{qf|Marge}} Here he is: {{Ch|Rex Harrison}} and {{Ch|Paul Anka}} rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it and go into business together.
 {{qf|Homer}} You want me to spend more time with Dad? What about my New Year's resolution?
@@ Line 67: / Line 66: @@
 {{qf|Milhouse}} You fool! Can't you see it's a massive government conspiracy? Or have they gotten to you too?
 :''[he and Bart start wrestling]''
-{{qf|Lisa}} Hey! Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it! Why are you guys jumping to such ridiculous conclusions? Haven't you ever heard of Occam's
+{{qf|Lisa}} Hey! Hey, hey, stop it! Stop it! Why are you guys jumping to such ridiculous conclusions? Haven't you ever heard of Occam's  Razor? "The simplest explanation is probably the correct one."
 {{qf|Bart}} So what's the simplest explanation?
@@ Line 119: / Line 117: @@
 {{qf|Milhouse}} ...are forcing our parents to go to bed early in a fiendish plot to eliminate the meal of dinner!
 ----
-{{qf|Grampa}} And just feast your ears on this tantalizing testimonial from my own flesh and blood, the son that puts the fun in
+{{qf|Grampa}} And just feast your ears on this tantalizing testimonial from my own flesh and blood, the son that puts the fun in  Simpson & Son, my son, Barney!
 {{qf|[[Barney]]}} ''[walks out from behind a curtain]'' I used to be a fat, disgusting slob. ''[belches]''
 {{qf|Man}} That medicine seems to be giving your son a lot of gas.

@@ Line 66: / Line 66: @@
 get rich with this scheme...and quick!
 ----
-'''Marge''': Here he is: [[Rex Harrison]] and [[Paul Anka]] rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it
+'''Marge''': Here he is: {{Ch|Rex Harrison}} and [[Paul Anka]] rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it
 and go into business together.

@@ Line 3: / Line 3: @@
 {{Cleanup}}
-'''[[Bart]]:''' "Mom, Dad, I saw a UFO!"
+'''[[Bart Simpson|Bart]]:''' "Mom, Dad, I saw a UFO!"
 (Reaches for light switch)
@@ Line 11: / Line 11: @@
 ----
-'''[[Lisa]]''': Mom! Dad! Look, this biography of Peter Ueberroth is only 99 cents. And I found the new [[Al Gore]] book. ''[holds it up]''
+'''[[Lisa Simpson|Lisa]]''': Mom! Dad! Look, this biography of Peter Ueberroth is only 99 cents. And I found the new [[Al Gore]] book. ''[holds it up]''
 '''Marge''': ''[reading the cover]'' ''[[Sane Planning, Sensible Tomorrow]]''.
@@ Line 38: / Line 38: @@
 ----
-'''Grampa''': Welcome home, son. I broke two lamps and lost all your mail. What's wrong with your wife?
+'''[[Abraham Simpson|Grampa]]''': Welcome home, son. I broke two lamps and lost all your mail. What's wrong with your wife?
 '''Homer''': Nevermind, you wouldn't understand.
@@ Line 66: / Line 66: @@
 get rich with this scheme...and quick!
 ----
-'''Marge''': Here he is: Rex Harrison and Paul Anka rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it
+'''Marge''': Here he is: [[Rex Harrison]] and [[Paul Anka]] rolled into one. Ooh, hmm. That tonic really works—you and Grampa should bottle it
 and go into business together.
@@ Line 79: / Line 79: @@
 '''Grampa''': Step right up, folks, and witness the magnificent medicinal miracle of Simpson & Son's patented revitalizing toniiic. Put some ardor in your larder with our energizing, moisturizing, tantalizing, romanticizing, surprising, her-prizing, revitalizing tonic.
 ----
-'''Mr. Van Houten''': Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together...and I found something for Milhouse down at the mall, too: [hands it to him] A pup tent!
+'''[[Kirk van Houten|Mr. Van Houten]]''': Tonight, we'll push the twin beds together...and I found something for Milhouse down at the mall, too: [hands it to him] A pup tent!
-'''Milhouse''': Oh, boy! Now I can sleep out in the yard.
+'''[[Milhouse van Houten|Milhouse]]''': Oh, boy! Now I can sleep out in the yard.
 '''Mr. Van Houten''': Yeah! Every single night.
@@ Line 87: / Line 87: @@
 '''Milhouse''': What's going on? Where are all the grown-ups?
-'''Nelson''': Who cares? With no adults, I run this city. [pauses, looks awkward] Um...carry on. [walks off]
+'''[[Nelson Muntz|Nelson]]''': Who cares? With no adults, I run this city. [pauses, looks awkward] Um...carry on. [walks off]
 '''Bart''': Listen to this: [reads] "Unexplainable behavior: individuals acting in a secretive fashion are often involved with UFOs or other paranormal phenomena, e.g., telephone explosions."
@@ Line 141: / Line 141: @@
 ''[Abe points out young Homer's shadow burned into the floor and wall. Flashback to Homer watching Kennedy on TV.]''
-'''Kennedy''': If I may, Helen, I'd like to respond to that question with yet another flip remark. ''[reporters laugh and sigh]''
+'''[[John F. Kennedy|Kennedy]]''': If I may, Helen, I'd like to respond to that question with yet another flip remark. ''[reporters laugh and sigh]''
 '''Homer''': Wow. ''[walks into kitchen]'' Look at me, er, uh, Mom: I am, er, uh, President Kennedy.
-'''Mrs. Simpson''': Oh, Abe. Maybe our Homer could grow up to be President some day.
+'''[[Mona Simpson|Mrs. Simpson]]''': Oh, Abe. Maybe our Homer could grow up to be President some day.
 '''Grampa''': You, President? This is the greatest country in the world. We've got a whole system set up to prevent people like you from ever becoming president. Quit your daydreaming, melonhead!
@@ Line 155: / Line 155: @@
 '''Homer''': Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement? Maybe I could have been something more than I am. Like a travel agent, to great scientist, or the inventor of a hilarious refrigerator alarm.
-'''Grampa''': Who are you to complain? You locked me up in a home and give me the same damn shower safety seat every Christmas.
+'''Grampa''': Who are you to complain? You locked me up in a home and give me the same damn shower safety seat every [[Christmas]].
 [in the car]
@@ Line 169: / Line 169: @@
 '''Homer''': All right, all right. That's it: we're going home! I'm sick of you and your stupid tonic.
-'''Abe''': If I hadn't taken that stupid tonic 38 years ago, you'd have never been born and I'd have been happy. You were an accident!
+'''Grampa''': If I hadn't taken that stupid tonic 38 years ago, you'd have never been born and I'd have been happy. You were an accident!
 '''Homer''': [gasps, stops the car] Get out.
@@ Line 204: / Line 204: @@
 Simpson & Son, my son, Barney!
-'''Barney''': [walks out from behind a curtain] I used to be a fat, disgusting slob. [belches]
+'''[[Barney Gumble|Barney]]''': [walks out from behind a curtain] I used to be a fat, disgusting slob. [belches]
 '''Man''': That medicine seems to be giving your son a lot of gas.
@@ Line 220: / Line 220: @@
 '''Lisa''': Dad, it's just that too much of your love can really be...scary.
-H'''omer''': Some day you'll thank me for all this scary love. But now I've gotta go somewhere and do some serious thinking.
+'''Homer''': Some day you'll thank me for all this scary love. But now I've gotta go somewhere and do some serious thinking.
 (Homer gets in the car and drives off.)

@@ Line 211: / Line 211: @@
 '''Barney''': Oh -- [collapses]
 ----
 '''Bart''': No offense, Homer, but your half-assed under-parenting was a lot more fun than your half-assed over-parenting.

@@ Line 13: / Line 13: @@
 '''[[Lisa]]''': Mom! Dad! Look, this biography of Peter Ueberroth is only 99 cents. And I found the new [[Al Gore]] book. ''[holds it up]''
-'''Marge''': ''[reading the cover]]'' ''[[Sane Planning, Sensible Tomorrow]]''.
+'''Marge''': ''[reading the cover]'' ''[[Sane Planning, Sensible Tomorrow]]''.
 '''Lisa''': Yeah, I hope it's as exciting as his other book, ''Rational Thinking, Reasonable Future''.