SolarBot: /* top */replaced: →

2021-05-09T14:26:54Z

‎top: replaced: →

Solar Dragon: Created page with "{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Winter of Our Monetized Content|The Fat Blue Line}} {{qf|Mr. Burns}} I thought this was my blood transfusion room, but, uh, there..."

2020-08-16T13:02:29Z

Created page with "{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Winter of Our Monetized Content|The Fat Blue Line}} {{qf|Mr. Burns}} I thought this was my blood transfusion room, but, uh, there..."

New page

{{TabQ|nogags}}
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Winter of Our Monetized Content|The Fat Blue Line}}

{{qf|[[Mr. Burns]]}} I thought this was my blood transfusion room, but, uh, there's not a baby in sight.
----
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} Stupid unpaid signature. This is the worst thing that ever happened at a nuclear power plant.
----
{{qf|Homer}} Mr. Burns, everyone who signed that birthday card chipped in except for you. You owe five dollars.
{{qf|Mr. Burns}} How dare you... give that the slightest worry. Hope you didn't lose any sleep over this little misunderstanding. Here, have a cricket on a thread for good luck.
----
{{qf|Homer}} Listen up, millenniums. I'm Homer Simpson, your new supervisor. So stop Snapchatting, Fortnite-ing and swiping right on your Uber Venmos.
{{qf|[[Angry Ricky]]}} We're actually replicating plant start-up sequences to simulate the effects of high-demand energy draws.
----
{{qf|[[Mike Wegman]]}} Are my ears hearing this? Are you seriously busting the clangers of Homer J. Simpsons? This man is a god and his clangers are unbustable. You're looking at the [[Michael Jordan]] of Sector 7G. And you humps aren't worthy to swill his backwash.
{{qf|Homer}} You're sticking up for me? Who are you?
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} Mike Wegman, nuclear intern. And your number one fan.
{{qf|Angry Ricky}} Yeah, well, your hero has a Pop-Tart in his cell phone holster.
----
{{qf|Homer}} Okay, which of these ties is better for my first day as a mentor? Purple stripes or this one?
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} ''[sniffs]'' Are you wearing my perfume?
{{qf|Homer}} I like it on you, he'll like it on me.
----
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Dad, it's not often that you... how do I put this? Care so much about your job?
{{qf|Homer}} Well, now that I'm a mentor, everything's changed. For the first time, another human being is dependent on me to guide them through life.
{{qf|[[Bart]] and Lisa}} ''[groan]''
----
{{qf|Homer}} This guy I'm menting is so cool. He listens with his mouth open. He's been blocked by so many celebrities on [[Twitter]]. And he thinks I'm the most valuable worker at the entire nuclear plant.
{{qf|Bart}} Oh, I get it. He's super dumb. ''[laughs]''
----
{{qf|Homer}} Mm. You're 35? Then why do you have a job of a 20-year-old and talk like a ten-year-old?
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} Here's how it is. So, my buddy 'Nesto and me were cleaning gutters for cash, when that idiot 'Nesto falls off and lands on a doghouse. Stupid 'Nesto. Then my parents are on my case to get a real career, something "closer to the ground." So I thought, "Why not follow my hero into man's greatest calling? Nuclear whatever." So I went down to the plant, told them I was part Native American... I could be, I always liked those guys... and boom! I'm an intern. Three short years later, got myself a mentor.
----
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} Hey, [[Lenny]], you duck-faced psycho, guess who's going to Homer Simpson's house for a meal? Me.
{{qf|[[Carl Carlson]]}} Uh, I'm Carl.
----
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} ''[to Bart]'' No one disrespects Homer Simpsons! Especially not an ugly little punk like you. That's right, I said "ugly." Your head looks like a rejected Muppet. Two golf balls glued to a can of oats. Between that Tommy Lasorda gut and those toothpick legs, you are not a kid... you are a walkin' potato clock.
{{qf|Lisa}} Ha-ha-ha! Ugly! Ha! ''[laughs uncontrollably]'' Muppet... ''[continues laughing]'' Ah! Toothpick legs! Potato clock!
----
{{qf|Mr. Burns}} Then it's my pleasure to tell you... that that is the stupidest idea I've ever heard. Get this intern out of my office, you nincompoop!
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} ''[groans angrily]'' Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Ho! No one disrespects Homer J. Simpsons.
{{qf|Homer}} No, Mike, don't.
{{qf|Mr. Burns}} Nin... com... poop!
{{qf|Mike Wegman}} Listen to me, you skunk-bag full of Centrum Silver sitting on your peanut brittle ass with your turn-of-the-century buzzard face. You ain't worthy to squeegee this man's back sweat. You smell like Chinese food that someone left in an old jack-o'-lantern. My mentor is the shiniest diamond in the whole Zales, so stuff your organs back in their jars and crawl in your mummy box, you sick, fungused-up, hep-C Dracula!

{{Season 31|Q}}

@@ Line 35: / Line 35: @@
 ----
 {{qf|Mike Wegman}} ''[to Bart]'' No one disrespects Homer Simpsons! Especially not an ugly little punk like you. That's right, I said "ugly." Your head looks like a rejected Muppet. Two golf balls glued to a can of oats. Between that Tommy Lasorda gut and those toothpick legs, you are not a kid... you are a walkin' potato clock.
-{{qf|Lisa}} Ha-ha-ha! Ugly! Ha! ''[laughs uncontrollably]'' Muppet...  ''[continues laughing]'' Ah! Toothpick legs! Potato clock!
+{{qf|Lisa}} Ha-ha-ha! Ugly! Ha! ''[laughs uncontrollably]'' Muppet... ''[continues laughing]'' Ah! Toothpick legs! Potato clock!
 ----
 {{qf|Mr. Burns}} Then it's my pleasure to tell you... that that is the stupidest idea I've ever heard. Get this intern out of my office, you nincompoop!

Go Big or Go Homer/Quotes - Revision history

SolarBot: /* top */replaced: →

Solar Dragon: Created page with "{{TabQ|nogags}} {{EpisodePrevNextQuo|The Winter of Our Monetized Content|The Fat Blue Line}} {{qf|Mr. Burns}} I thought this was my blood transfusion room, but, uh, there..."